When I caught my son searching online for ways to solve the Rubik’s Cube, my reaction was intense—akin to when my uncle revealed that professional wrestling is staged. I went on a rant about how looking up solutions is cheating; after all, the real purpose of the Rubik’s Cube is to challenge kids, to let them experience frustration and perseverance. My son looked at me, clearly thinking I had lost my mind.
I have a deep appreciation for technology—I even work in the field. It’s astonishing to realize that children today will never know a world where technology isn’t a part of their daily lives. My toddler won’t understand the concept of phone conversations without video, and my daughter will never face the annoyance of navigating a card catalog. But when it comes to solving a Rubik’s Cube? That’s where I draw the line.
I’ve certainly Googled my fair share of odd queries. When I was expecting my first child, I actually searched, “Can you break your vagina?” because I thought I was experiencing some serious pain. It turned out to be contractions (which I would have preferred to avoid). My husband and I even transformed our entire front yard after watching some hilarious landscaping videos, once we stopped laughing at the host’s antics.
So, when does technology hinder self-reliance? Kids no longer need to struggle through problems; they just look it up. My generation, Generation X, is known for being skeptical and cautious, living by the philosophy of “trust but verify.” In contrast, the Millennials that followed often appear entitled and are known for their extended transitions into adulthood, marrying and securing jobs several years later than previous generations. They seem to rely on their parents more than any prior generation.
Entitlement is a behavior that is taught, so how can I foster a sense of responsibility in my children when technology makes everything so accessible? Naturally, each generation aspires to offer their kids a better life than they had. However, it’s essential for my children to grasp that freedom without accountability is meaningless. No amount of technological shortcuts can replace the value of hard work. Sure, you might reach the top more quickly, but the journey is what makes success truly fulfilling.
We currently live in an age of pervasive helicopter parenting. This overwhelming focus on children stems from love, but what are the long-term effects when these kids finally leave home? How do we encourage self-actualization when their every move has been controlled? We must find a balance between nurturing our kids and allowing them the space to grow independently—without looking back in regret and questioning if we did enough.
Raising the next generation of innovators and thinkers is an ongoing challenge. Whether you’re a parent, educator, or family member, we must consider the qualities we wish to nurture in our children. It can be daunting to step back from the daily grind of parenting, but doing so may help us identify the traits that will lead to their success as adults. Once we recognize these attributes, we can adopt a parenting approach that allows them to flourish, ultimately helping us feel a greater sense of control.
This article was originally published on June 30, 2015.
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Summary:
Navigating parenting in a technology-driven world poses unique challenges, especially when it comes to fostering self-reliance in children. As parents, it is crucial to find a balance between embracing the conveniences of technology and allowing kids the space to experience growth through struggle. This insight can lead to raising a generation of empowered and capable adults.