Let me be clear: this pandemic is incredibly difficult, especially for our children. I have a 9-year-old and a 14-year-old. My teenager should be out with his friends on weekends, exploring the town, chatting about life, and catching films at the local theater. My younger one should be enjoying after-school playdates, attending birthday parties, and eagerly anticipating his first sleepover.
Instead, both of my boys have not had any in-person interactions with their peers since March, and I don’t see that changing until the pandemic is under control.
Fortunately, they get along relatively well—well, as much as two spirited and headstrong brothers can. They spend hours playing video games, share their own jokes, and occasionally bicker like crazy. So, they aren’t completely deprived of interaction. However, they are nearly five years apart, and it’s crucial for them to engage with kids their own age. It’s not natural for them to be isolated like this. It pains me to think about what they’re missing socially.
They’re managing as best they can, but there are limits. My teenager plays live video games for long stretches with his buddies and has even made new friends through our local youth center’s online programs. He participated in a virtual play over the summer and is set to do so again this winter. I often hear laughter from his room as he chats with friends. But it’s not the teenage experience I envisioned. I remember how eager I was at that age to be with my friends. Phone calls led to meet-ups, and nothing was as magical as a sleepover with best friends, sharing secrets until the early hours.
This reality for my son breaks my heart. I worry even more for my 9-year-old. The concept of “virtual playdates” hasn’t quite clicked with him, although I remain hopeful. At first, he was resistant to the idea of interacting with other kids over video chat. He has warmed up somewhat, but finding other kids to connect with online has been challenging, and the few playdates we’ve arranged haven’t been fulfilling for him.
I’m concerned about how this pandemic is affecting his emotional growth. I fear he may feel lonely. I can only hope he finds enough connection in his interactions with family, his online teacher, and classmates. I notice him bonding with other students during virtual classes, and I’m optimistic that these connections will lead to more satisfying online social experiences.
Despite these worries, my kids won’t be having playdates anytime soon. Why am I so strict? The pandemic is still rampant, with COVID-19 cases hitting record highs in our country. Our current leadership isn’t taking the necessary actions to mitigate the spread, and I believe it’s my duty to avoid any actions that could contribute to the virus spreading.
My family has a responsibility to protect others. Their social interactions must take a back seat to safeguarding the vulnerable among us. My children can endure missing out on a season or even a year of social life to help slow the virus’s spread. They understand this, and I believe it teaches them valuable lessons about kindness, morality, resilience, and adaptability.
Beyond societal responsibility, I’m terrified of the possibility of my family contracting COVID-19. While children generally fare better than adults, there have been fatalities, often among those with underlying conditions. Both of my children have asthma, and my younger one had a severe asthma attack last year that required emergency care. I won’t risk exposing them to a respiratory illness that targets the lungs.
The potential long-term effects of COVID-19 are also concerning. It’s not just about short-term illness; there are long-term health repercussions like lung damage, heart issues, and debilitating fatigue. Would I want that for my family? Absolutely not. As much as my children need social interaction, I won’t risk their health for a playdate.
Even if there were a safer way to arrange playdates, such as outdoor meetings with masks and social distancing, I question how much enjoyment they would derive from such arrangements. I’ve suggested these options to them, but they show little interest. Plus, ensuring that kids adhere to social distancing and mask-wearing is difficult without constant supervision, which is hardly the fun experience they crave.
Thus, my children will not be having playdates until the risk of COVID-19 decreases significantly, likely requiring a vaccine or reliable treatment to ensure that severe outcomes are rare. We will wait, even if it takes another season or more. I believe we will manage, as challenging as this situation is. My kids are adapting with more strength and resilience than I anticipated, and I’m proud of how they are handling it.
One day, this nightmare will end, and their social lives will flourish once again. I’ll be ordering pizzas for my older son and his friends as they gather at our dining room table, laughing about things I don’t understand. My younger son will finally visit his neighbor friend again, returning home with warm chocolate chip cookies they baked together.
I look forward to those days, and I hope that when my kids resume playing with friends, they will have a newfound appreciation for friendship, laughter, and the simple joys of childhood.
For more on this topic, check out this insightful article from our blog. If you’re seeking expert information, this resource is highly recommended. Additionally, you can visit the CDC’s page on infertility for valuable information.
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Summary:
In this reflective piece, a mother shares her struggles with allowing her children to have playdates during the ongoing pandemic. She expresses concern for their social development while emphasizing the importance of safety and responsibility in protecting others. The article explores the emotional and psychological impacts of isolation on children and the mother’s commitment to waiting for a safer environment for social interaction.