I’ve had the privilege of having the same best friend, Mia, for over three decades. This isn’t one of those friendships where life gets in the way, and we lose touch for months at a time. Mia is my ride-or-die; she’s the one who knows how to lift my spirits or give me a much-needed reality check. We share similar tastes in everything from fashion to home decor, we can finish each other’s sentences, and we adore each other’s kids as if they were our own. We agree on nearly everything—except for one pivotal issue.
Mia has chosen not to vaccinate her children.
When I first became pregnant, there was never any doubt in my mind that I would vaccinate my kids. I trust the science behind it. My research has shown me the lives saved by vaccines—diseases that have become rare thanks to immunization. I’ve always kept a watchful eye on my kids after their shots and felt reassured that I was making the right decision not only for them but also for the community.
Initially, when Mia brought up the topic, I thought she was just curious. After all, she was expecting her first baby soon, and I assumed she wanted to ensure her child would be safe from preventable diseases. However, I soon realized her inquiries stemmed from a different perspective.
Mia had decided against vaccinations for her children. While she was silent about my choice at first, she has since become vocal, questioning my decision and expressing judgment about my parenting. Frankly, I find her stance misguided.
It is my responsibility to protect my children from diseases like whooping cough, measles, and chickenpox. She has lectured me about the “toxic” ingredients in vaccines, referring to formaldehyde, which is already a natural part of our bodies. In fact, newborns have more formaldehyde in their systems than what is found in vaccines. It’s a no-brainer to me.
Mia often cites recent outbreaks of measles and whooping cough, arguing that those who were vaccinated still contracted these diseases. She dismisses the concept of herd immunity, which is crucial for protecting those who cannot be vaccinated for medical reasons. I once asked her how she would feel if her children unknowingly carried a virus and infected a newborn who hadn’t yet received their vaccinations. Her response? “We don’t hang out with babies for that reason.” What?!
Measles is highly contagious. She doesn’t have to be in close proximity to a baby to pose a risk. What about at the grocery store or the playground? The CDC states that measles is so contagious that up to 90% of unvaccinated individuals close to someone infected will also become infected. That’s a staggering statistic that cannot be brushed aside.
Mia’s choice not to vaccinate puts not only her children at risk but also those who are vulnerable. When I asked her how she would react if one of her kids caught measles or whooping cough, she said she feared the vaccines might cause autism.
However, extensive research has debunked any link between vaccines and autism. Moreover, autism itself is not something that needs to be “fixed.” However, the consequences of letting preventable diseases run rampant are severe and frightening.
At the end of the day, I can’t accept the potential repercussions of not vaccinating my family. I refuse to take the risk that my kids could suffer from long-term health issues due to chickenpox or, worse, become part of a measles outbreak. I also cannot bear the thought of exposing a vulnerable infant or someone with a compromised immune system because of her decision.
I’m deeply frustrated with Mia for believing she knows better than medical professionals and for acting like her opinion is above scientific consensus. I’m tired of hearing her lectures and rants about “poisons” in vaccines. We’ve both stated our positions multiple times, and instead of agreeing to differ, she continues to bring it up.
I’m at a crossroads. Should I walk away from a friendship of over 30 years because we disagree on vaccinations? That’s not what I want. However, the tension is palpable, and I’m exhausted from it. I need to let this go and return to a place of harmony with Mia, but I’m not sure that’s possible unless we can come to terms with each other’s choices. Given the importance of vaccinations, I’m skeptical we can find common ground.
If you want to explore more about this topic, check out this blog post, which shares insights on related issues. For those seeking authoritative guidance, this resource provides excellent information on vaccination and health. Additionally, for anyone looking for more statistics, the CDC has a wealth of information on public health and immunization.
In summary, navigating a friendship strained by differing views on vaccination is challenging. While I value my long-standing relationship with Mia, I find myself grappling with how to move forward when we are so fundamentally at odds.