The girl has left the building. College beckons, and she’s off to her new dorm on the tenth floor of one of the busiest sections of her sprawling D1 campus. It’s likely there are more students on her floor than in her entire graduating class.
She’s beyond excited, ready to take on the world, and honestly, no one who knows her is surprised. Her final summer at home felt like she was a phantom, constantly on the move with three jobs. I often went days only catching a whiff of her shampoo as she zoomed past. Reflecting on it now, I think the universe was preparing me for her absence.
As she transitioned from adolescence, her restlessness grew at a breakneck pace. By the end of the graduation celebrations, she was finished with her small-town life. She was ready for college, and I get it—it’s in her blood, just like her mother.
After we dropped her off, I hesitated a few days before entering her room. To be honest, I could have entered with a steam cleaner or a bulldozer. (Any mother of a teenage daughter can relate.) It was a mess. I had held my tongue through the final weeks of summer, hoping for a drama-free send-off. Departure day was stressful enough without adding to it.
As the hours passed on her last night at home, I noticed her anxiety bubbling over. “Where’s my insurance card?!” she shrieked, only to follow it up ten minutes later with a barely audible, “Oh, here it is.” This scenario repeated a few times.
She left in a whirlwind of excitement for a new chapter, embodying all the emotions one would expect: bittersweet, melancholic, and a hint of eagerness on both sides. I sent my oldest child off to the Air Force Reserves a couple of years ago, so I’m not a novice at this. With him, though, it was a different experience. While she is restless, he was reckless, and I can assure you, I never slept better than the day he was safely in boot camp.
I genuinely find myself thrilled for her. Surprisingly, I don’t miss her as acutely as I anticipated. She checks in more frequently than she did while living at home, sharing more details about her experiences than I ever expected. She’s reveling in the grown-up lifestyle she craved.
That said, I know this will come back to haunt me when she returns for breaks. The inevitable “Rules? What do you mean by rules?” debates are brewing. I can sense the good times are ahead…
In her absence, I find a certain calmness in my mornings, no frantic searches for my comb or mascara. For now, there are no wet towels strewn across her floor.
Yet, I miss our movie nights watching Rock of Ages together, and I feel a pang of sadness realizing I don’t need to order a vegetarian dish for takeout anymore. The scent of expensive shampoo is replaced by Old Spice and Axe, but I know she’s only away temporarily.
And yes, I miss her deeply. Just as I was finishing this piece, another text buzzed in: “I miss you guys.” Perhaps all that teenage angst is fading. Maybe she heard an ’80s song and thought of me or is excited to return to her tidy room at Thanksgiving. Whatever the reason, I’m holding onto that text.
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Summary
As a mother adjusts to her child’s departure for college, she experiences a mix of emotions, from excitement to missing the little things that made their daily life special. Despite the challenges of letting go, she finds joy in her daughter’s new adventures while preparing for the inevitable change when she returns home.