Last week was one of those overwhelming days. You know the type — when everything seems just a bit more challenging than usual, and it feels like the universe is conspiring against you. I was drowning in tasks, my home was a chaos zone, and the laundry was practically a mountain. I found myself snapping at my kids and short with my partner. Exhaustion had become my constant companion, leaving me to question my ability to juggle motherhood, partnership, and everything else on my plate.
Honestly, it hasn’t just been one tough day; it’s been a relentless month. I’ve been swamped, distracted, and stressed. Late nights spent on work projects have stolen my sleep, while volunteer commitments have pulled me away from home. I can’t even recall the last time I managed a grocery run or cooked a proper meal. Bedtimes have turned into races, chores have been neglected, and I’m perpetually late. It’s no wonder I’ve been feeling insecure about my parenting skills during this time.
I won’t bore you with the specifics of my chaotic month because, let’s face it, we’ve all had our share of madness. We’re all busy, with our own struggles, and we know the nagging doubt of wondering if we measure up—whether as employees, partners, friends, or, most critically, as parents.
For weeks, I’ve been consumed by the fear that I’m completely ruining this parenting thing. Guilt about time spent away from my kids has weighed heavily on me. I’ve fretted over every little thing — those moments when I respond with “just a minute” while frantically typing work emails, the nights I’ve missed bedtime due to meetings, or the times I’ve resorted to quick dinners of cereal or fast food. I’ve even raised my voice too many times, telling them to “just go to bed already!”
Each night, I’d lie in bed, mentally tallying my “Parenting Mistakes of the Day.” I often fell asleep before I could finish the list. Isn’t that the nature of parenting? We tend to dwell on our shortcomings and focus on what we didn’t accomplish rather than celebrating our victories.
But what about the positives? What about the love we give, the comforting hugs, the tears we’ve wiped away, the snacks we’ve prepared, and the homework we’ve checked? What about all the good we do?
The other day, in the midst of my self-doubt, my younger son, Jake, handed me a note he had written. It simply said, “I love you, Mom. You are the best. Thank you for being so nice.” This sweet gesture made me pause and reconsider my harsh self-assessment. Perhaps it’s beneficial for our children to see us striving in areas beyond parenting, to recognize that we have responsibilities that extend beyond their needs. They don’t need to believe that our lives revolve around them 24/7 to feel valued. Maybe they notice our efforts more than our perceived failures.
Despite my worries and distractions, Jake, who holds a special place in my heart, thinks I’m doing well — not just okay, but the best. If our beloved children can see us in such a light, perhaps we are, in fact, doing something right.
I may not be a flawless parent, but to my kids, I might just be the best. And I’ll embrace that.
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Summary
Parenting can feel overwhelming, with many moments of self-doubt. However, it’s essential to recognize both our struggles and successes. Children often appreciate our efforts more than we realize, reminding us that we are doing better than we think. Embracing the love and support from our kids can help us see the positive side of our parenting journey.