It finally happened—I encountered that elusive figure known as the Cool Mom at the neighborhood park, and we exchanged contact information. I had heard tales of such connections, but I never imagined it would happen to me. The process of finding fellow moms I’d genuinely enjoy spending time with feels strikingly similar to dating, and the thought alone fills me with anxiety.
As we chatted about the amusing antics of toddlers, our shared exhaustion, and the lovely weather, she casually pulled out her phone and suggested, “We should definitely stay in touch.” We swapped numbers, said our farewells, and parted ways.
Later that evening, after the kids were tucked in, I glanced at my phone and opened the messaging app. My fingers hovered over the keyboard, and then my nerves kicked in. Within minutes, my mind raced through various scenarios:
- What do I even say?
- Will she remember our conversation?
- Oh no, if I text her too quickly, she might think I’m too eager.
- But if I wait too long, she might view me as flaky.
- Should I adhere to the 3-Day Rule?
Ugh, this is ridiculous; just send her a message! She seemed great—there’s a chance we could become fast friends.
We could establish a regular girls’ night and arrange playdates for our kids. Perhaps a family barbecue! But wait—she looked fit. What if she’s vegan or following that trendy caveman diet? But if that’s the case, it’s clearly working for her; she rocked those yoga pants like a pro. Sigh, I should really start eating better. Alright, I’ll text her. Suggest a meet-up at the park next weekend. Will she think it’s odd to meet in public? I can’t invite her over—my house needs a serious clean-up. Hers is probably immaculate. Or maybe not? She seemed so relaxed. I bet she has laundry piles too. Okay, I’m going to send that text! Tonight! But what can I say that sounds clever, concise, friendly, and won’t leave her wondering, “Who is this?”
It’s overwhelming.
After two days of deliberation, I finally sent a message to Cool Mom. “Hi! We had such a great time meeting you at the park the other day. We’ll be there with a picnic lunch around noon on Saturday if you’d like to join us!”
Boom. Done. Now the waiting game begins. It feels just like dating.
Additional Resources
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Summary
Making mom friends can be just as nerve-wracking as dating, from exchanging numbers to worrying about how to initiate the next conversation. The excitement and anxiety mirror the early stages of romantic relationships, where the stakes feel high, and the desire to connect is strong.