Feeling inadequate as a parent? Just read any article or study offering sleep guidance, and you might end up feeling like a failure. Recently, a prominent piece circulated about the necessity of early bedtimes for kids, complete with studies, theories, and anecdotal evidence claiming that enforcing a bedtime of 7:30 p.m. leads to happier, smarter, and healthier children.
I couldn’t help but feel like a total disaster. My children have always gone to sleep later; we start our wind-down routine around 8 p.m., but it often stretches on for what feels like an eternity, with them finally drifting off around 9 or even 9:30.
But then I paused to reflect. My kids are thriving—smart, healthy, and generally well-behaved, despite the occasional “I’m a kid and I had a meltdown” moment. Sure, they seem a bit tired sometimes, but that’s normal for anyone, right? Maybe I’m not as much of a failure as I thought. Between naps for the younger one and a few extra hours in the morning for the older, they might just be getting the sleep they need, regardless of when it happens. And honestly, how can anyone conclusively blame late bedtimes for any issues?
Some children are simply night owls, like mine. They tend to sleep in more than most, and while various articles tout the benefits of earlier sleep for restorative rest, perhaps it’s just their natural rhythm.
I’ve tried initiating bedtime earlier, enforcing a drill-sergeant approach to the pre-sleep routine, but once the lights go out, I’m met with a barrage of questions. “Mommy, why is the sky blue? Mommy, what happens when we die?” I can’t just brush these off, right? These are vital conversations, and I cherish these moments, even if it means they fall asleep a bit later.
Moreover, pushing for an earlier bedtime doesn’t align with our family dynamics. My older child is in school, returning home in the afternoon to unwind with snacks and screen time before dinner and homework. Family time is essential for us, especially the time my kids spend with their dad. We prioritize this bonding, and it’s not uncommon for my husband to help with the bedtime routine. If he’s running late, the kids struggle to settle down without him.
Is that a bad habit? Some might think so. Sure, we allow them to sleep later and even lie down with them if needed. Oh boy, that probably goes against all the sleep guidelines out there!
The truth is, every family should find a routine that suits them. If early bedtimes work for you, that’s fantastic! But if you find yourself in the same boat as me with night owls, high five! Theories are just that—ideas. Research can change over time, and there’s bound to be new information suggesting that late nights could lead to extraordinary outcomes.
In parenting, especially concerning sleep, the best approach is to do what feels right for you and your children. Anything outside of that often adds unnecessary stress. For more insights on parenting, visit this excellent resource for pregnancy and home insemination topics.
For those interested in exploring more about family dynamics, check out this blog post. And for a broader understanding of parenting philosophies, visit Natural Parenting.
In summary, embrace what works best for your family. Late bedtimes might not align with conventional wisdom, but that doesn’t mean they can’t lead to happy, healthy children.