There’s a weight on my heart that I’ve carried for far too long. I hesitated to share this part of my life, fearing it might come across as overly political. But the reality is, it’s deeply personal. I’m about to open up about something significant, and I hope you’ll read this with an open heart and mind. My family relies on Medicaid, and here’s why.
Our Journey Begins
When I married my husband, I was fortunate enough to leave my job and become a stay-at-home mom while he took on the role of our family’s primary breadwinner. He poured his heart into his work, taking great pride in supporting us. With his PhD, he earned a good salary that allowed us to live comfortably and enjoy solid health insurance. I was genuinely grateful for the life we built together.
A Sudden Change
However, everything changed when his health began to decline. We found ourselves spending a significant portion of our income on medications, home health services, and medical bills. As we faced these financial challenges, our savings dwindled, reminding us that illness comes with a hefty price tag.
After his passing, our income vanished, along with his health insurance. While I was thankful for the Social Security survivor benefits that came our way due to his years of hard work, navigating health insurance became a daunting task. I explored purchasing a new plan but was directed to Medicaid because we qualified.
The Struggle with Guilt
Continuing the coverage we had was not feasible; the COBRA premiums exceeded our new monthly income. I considered re-entering the workforce immediately, but my children were grappling with their own fears and changes—transitioning to public school and managing grief. They needed me present, stable, and involved in their lives, especially during this tumultuous time.
Despite knowing we made the right choice for our family, I grapple with feelings of guilt and shame daily. I hear people’s harsh judgments about Medicaid recipients—often labeling them as lazy or manipulative. This perception saddens me, making me question if that’s how we are viewed now. Are we suddenly seen as less worthy because we find ourselves in this challenging situation?
Contributions and Misconceptions
Both my husband and I contributed to systems like Medicaid through our hard work, yet I still feel guilty relying on it—even temporarily—while I rebuild our lives after loss. I’m striving to establish a career that will eventually enable my family to obtain affordable private insurance, but for now, I find myself under scrutiny for owning a minivan, an iPhone, and having a safe home—all of which were part of our lives long before my husband’s death.
Everywhere I turn—on TV, social media, or in casual conversations—I sense judgment directed at families like mine. Do people realize we exist when they toss around disparaging remarks about “lazy people on Medicaid”? Are we the family they envision when they complain about “poor people without jobs” inflating their healthcare costs?
Navigating a New Reality
The challenges we faced were unforeseen. I never anticipated my husband’s illness or the financial strain it would place on us. I never wished for my kids and me to require regular counseling, nor did I expect to become a family of four instead of five. But here we are, navigating this new reality, and Medicaid is a vital support system for us during this difficult time.
It’s essential to recognize that nearly 70 million Americans depend on Medicaid—that’s 1 in 5 people in this country! Medicaid serves various individuals: the elderly, children, those with disabilities, and people like me, who are trying to recover from a life-altering event. Each of us has our own story, and it’s crucial to approach these situations without assumptions.
Clarifying Misunderstandings
I want to clarify that I’m not lazy or trying to exploit the system. I’m doing my best to rebuild our lives while taking care of my family’s financial, emotional, and spiritual needs. I’m aware of the privilege of having survivor benefits, especially when many families don’t have that support. I often think of those who may not qualify for assistance and hope one day to help them find a little security during their struggles.
Facing Uncertainty
Currently, I’m not feeling secure myself. The challenges of being a widowed mother have taken a toll on my self-confidence. Every day brings new worries about what will happen if Medicaid is taken away from us. What about my son’s pre-existing condition? Will we be able to afford his medications? What if my children can’t continue their counseling? Who will take care of them, and at what cost? These questions swirl in my mind as I continuously reassess our options.
A Path Forward
Yet, I remind myself that relying on Medicaid right now is the best decision for our family. It’s not a permanent solution, but it’s what we need as we heal and work towards a better future. Life can change in the blink of an eye, and no one is immune to needing help. Understanding, kindness, and support are essential in a world that can be harsh and judgmental.
Compassion in Difficult Times
Let’s strive to show one another compassion, especially when life gets tough. We all need that extra grace; let’s offer it freely.
Conclusion
In summary, my family’s reliance on Medicaid is not a reflection of laziness or moral failing, but rather a necessity during a challenging time. As we navigate this journey, I hope for a future where I can help others in similar situations.