When it comes to love, do you take this person to be your lawfully wedded partner? To embrace and cherish, through the trials of pregnancy discomforts and awkward moments, like when they indulge a bit too much at the holiday gathering and end up tossing their cookies in the backseat? And do you take this person to be your spouse? For better or worse, through laughter-inducing flatulence and socks that can practically stand on their own, and the inevitable nail clippings scattered about?
These less-than-appealing aspects of life hardly cross your mind when you first fall head over heels for someone. They’re captivating! Irresistibly charming! So delightful to be around! In those initial stages, it’s challenging to envision anything unappealing about them — or they about you.
You might believe they wake up with that ideal tousled hair and a refreshing scent, while they’re convinced you’re a flawless being, free of any bodily issues. You navigate bathroom breaks like a secret mission, utilizing your strong pelvic floor to keep your stream discreet, or running the faucet so your perfect partner doesn’t hear that unmistakable splash. Your burps are stifled, evaporating quietly before they can tarnish your image. During those first few nights spent together, you dread the thought of snoring — or worse, farting — in your sleep and revealing your humanity. Gross bodily functions? Not on my watch!
As your relationship deepens, comfort settles in, and you start to notice those quirks — like a bit of earwax or the most atrocious morning breath imaginable. Before long, you find yourselves giggling as you pass gas in front of each other, masked with a polite “Excuse me.” It’s a slippery slope from there. What once seemed unimaginable becomes the norm; you might find yourself perched on the bathroom sink, clipping your toenails in your comfy sweats while your partner casually discusses the aftermath of that spicy Mexican meal from last night — all from their throne, of course.
In the end, it’s nearly impossible to foster a deep connection with someone — especially a live-in partner — without encountering the messy, sometimes odoriferous aspects of life. We tend to overlook these gross parts because, by the time we recognize our partners as human (and thus a bit unrefined), we’re often too enamored with their positive traits to be deterred by things like foot odor or the occasional unflattering body function (because let’s be honest, we’re tired of holding in our gas too).
Isn’t it fascinating how that works? We conceal these natural, albeit slightly unpleasant traits from one another, despite knowing our partners experience the same things as everyone else — plaque buildup, digestive surprises, and the odd foot callus. Our attraction often blinds us until we reach a level of emotional comfort. And yes, it’s true that long after reaching that comfort zone, everyone has a personal “relationship grossness threshold.” For instance, my partner has no qualms about chatting while on the toilet, yet he shooes me away when it’s time to wipe. Conversely, he’s witnessed childbirth-related mishaps and explored the anatomy of my body, but I draw the line at him witnessing my upper lip waxing. Why some things are more off-limits than others remains a mystery, but it seems healthy to keep a few secrets.
Ultimately, the ability to be gross in front of one another is a positive aspect of a relationship. It communicates a vital message: “I trust you, and I’m comfortable enough to reveal my flaws without fear of losing you.” You might not need to say it out loud, as love can be expressed in many ways… including the sound of a fart.
For more insights on navigating relationships and family planning, check out our posts on fertility boosters for men and resources about pregnancy and home insemination.
Summary:
In relationships, embracing the gross aspects of each other can be a sign of comfort and deep trust. As partners become more comfortable, they begin to share their bodily quirks and flaws, which can strengthen their bond. While everyone has their own limits regarding what they consider acceptable to share, being open about these natural functions can ultimately enhance intimacy and connection.