As the chilly season arrives, it brings with it the joys of warm drinks, cozy evenings, and festive decorations. Yet, despite the winter wonderland outside, my boys seem to think it’s summer vacation, opting for shorts and T-shirts while ignoring the biting cold.
After more than 40 years on this planet and over a decade of parenting, I’ve accepted there are just some things I’ll never grasp. For instance, why my kids find joy in watching countless YouTube videos of unboxing random items. And honestly, trying to figure out the logic behind them staying up late only to wake up earlier is beyond me.
However, the biggest conundrum remains: why do my tween and teen sons insist on dressing as if they’re headed to the beach while snowflakes are falling? Even when there’s a blanket of snow outside and their breath is visible in the air, they adamantly refuse to don anything warm, opting instead for bare arms and legs.
To their credit, they rarely voice their discomfort. They’ve learned through experience that if they dare to shiver in my presence after I’ve warned them about the cold, they’ll only receive my disapproving glare. So, I’ve decided to stop the endless reminders about dressing appropriately. If they feel cold, surely they’ll choose to wear warmer clothes, or so I hope. But these stubborn kids seem willing to endure frostbite rather than admit their mom was right about needing a hat or gloves.
What truly frustrates me isn’t their choice of clothing or even the potential for them to feel cold. It’s the unsolicited comments I receive from others.
“No, cashier, my son won’t catch a cold just because he’s not wearing a coat. That’s not how illness works.” If he does get sick, it will be due to being in a germ-filled classroom all winter.
“Yes, Aunt Lila, I do provide my children with coats, hats, and gloves. They simply choose not to wear them. I’m allowing them to experience the natural consequences of their choices (which, in this case, is being cold).”
“No, random passerby, I can’t physically force my son to wear a coat. He’s 11 and nearly as tall as I am. Even if I could manage to push his arms into a jacket, I wouldn’t. It’s about respecting his autonomy.”
One of the most important lessons I’ve learned in parenting is the need to pick your battles, and this just isn’t one I’m willing to fight. So here we are, temperatures hovering around the mid-30s, frost underfoot, and snow on the horizon. My sons are clad in shorts and T-shirts as I try to suppress the urge to insist they put on some warmer clothes.
This article originally appeared in a previous format but has been updated for your reading pleasure.
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In summary, I’ve decided to let my boys navigate their own choices when it comes to clothing in cold weather, despite the well-meaning advice from others. It’s a lesson in autonomy and consequence, one that I hope will serve them well in the future.