On that memorable day at the Women’s March, I found myself surrounded by a throng of enthusiastic supporters. As I looked around, unsure of how to fully engage, I simply smiled and began to sway to the rhythm of the chants. My nearly four-year-old daughter stood in the center of it all, commanding the attention of 15 to 20 people snapping photos, while hundreds more echoed her spirited cries of “My body, my choice!” The crowd responded with equal enthusiasm, shouting back, “Her body, her choice!”
Rather than being fully present in this remarkable moment, I felt a strange detachment, like an observer with no influence over the unfolding scene. Yet, I realized that I was a crucial part of it, serving as my daughter’s pedestal as she captivated everyone within earshot. Throughout the day, as she discovered her ability to rally the crowd, she initiated various chants. Most were centered on women’s rights, with one spirited anti-Trump chant thrown in for good measure—a sentiment I personally resonate with, although I grappled with its appropriateness given her young age. Her enthusiastic chanting and marching continued until we finally left the bustling crowd and made our way home.
This all took place the day after the 2017 presidential inauguration, at the Women’s March in Washington, D.C. My wife and I felt compelled to attend not only because we live in the area but also out of a deep commitment to the cause and our desire to raise an empowered daughter.
The march aimed to express solidarity for equality and protest against misogyny, sexism, and disenfranchisement. While I didn’t think that opposing the new president was its primary focus, many participants did indeed take to the streets to voice their discontent with a leader who had made derogatory comments about women and exploited racial tensions for political gain.
You might judge our decision to bring our daughter as questionable. After all, we allowed her to engage with aspects of the march that some might argue are beyond her comprehension. Is this not a form of cultural indoctrination? Certainly, but before you reach your conclusions, consider two points:
- She picked up a “My Body, My Choice” sign simply because she wanted to be part of the experience, drawn to its vibrant colors.
- We explained the words to her, as she is beginning to read.
I had no idea she would start chanting. I was equally unprepared for the surprising influence a toddler could wield over a large crowd, especially when she began leading the chant, “Hey hey! Ho ho! That Donald Trump has got to go, hey hey!”
At first, I felt a surge of discomfort. Was I, as a parent, inadvertently allowing her to participate mindlessly in a demonstration that seemed to require a deeper understanding? I’ve previously criticized other parents who use their children as props in political rallies, and I found myself questioning the wisdom of my own choices.
However, I quickly confronted my privilege as a white man whose life experiences have seldom intersected with issues of sexism or racial prejudice. My understanding of these struggles comes largely through my wife, who is biracial, and from the stories of friends and family.
Viewing the situation through my own lens, I grappled with the notion that perhaps exposing my daughter to these ideals at such a young age was misguided. Children require a foundational understanding before they can authentically engage in activism. They need context to understand the significance of the messages they are chanting.
Yet, upon further reflection, I recognized that my daughter wasn’t promoting any harmful or false ideas. Her body is indeed her own, a truth we have instilled in her since she was able to speak. Living in a culture that often excuses the actions of (mostly white) men who perpetrate violence against women, it is essential that she learns early on that her boundaries must be respected.
This is particularly important in a society where discussions surrounding women’s health care, including abortion, are fraught with misinformation. My wife and I are pro-choice—not pro-abortion—a distinction we feel is vital. We encourage our daughter to discover her own beliefs, but we also want her to understand that the choice is ultimately hers.
I have no regrets about my daughter embracing her role as a young activist at the Women’s March. She held her sign high, embodying the belief that her body belongs to her, and I am proud of that.
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In summary, witnessing my daughter lead a crowd at the Women’s March was a profound experience that challenged my perceptions of activism, childhood, and the importance of instilling values of autonomy and respect for oneself in our children.