To my little boy, Oliver, in the unexpected event of my early departure:
Life has taken a whirlwind turn these past few months.
On March 18 of this year, you came into my world as a new father. Just days earlier, on March 7, I experienced a stroke at the age of 36. It wasn’t a catastrophic stroke—no paralysis or vision loss—but as a neurologist put it, it was a wake-up call. While you are settling into a delightful cycle of feeding, sleeping, and diaper changes, your father is navigating a maze of medical specialists in neurology, cardiology, and more, all trying to figure out what triggered this scare. So far, despite countless tests including MRIs and echocardiograms, they’ve come up empty-handed.
I’m not one to dwell on the morbid, and this is not a farewell letter. However, it wouldn’t be a complete shock if this warning sign were to lead to something more serious. Therefore, I feel compelled to share some fatherly wisdom—just in case disaster strikes.
Family First
First and foremost, know that your immediate family—your mother, grandparents, and certain aunts and uncles—love you deeply. You are cherished just as you are, and the sooner you recognize this, the easier it will be to accept a crucial truth: Outside of this circle, not everyone will hold you in the same high regard.
Despite the awards and accolades you may earn throughout childhood, real life doesn’t hand out participation trophies. You will face challenges and setbacks, and that’s perfectly normal. Part of growing up is discovering your unique talents, and that process can’t begin if you’re receiving insincere praise at every step.
You might witness your peers receiving unearned recognition for every little achievement. This relentless need for validation can breed arrogance in young adults who believe they are skilled at everything, often leading to embarrassing situations. Look up “Generation Z” for examples.
Your mother won’t proclaim you a baseball prodigy if you struggle to hit in Little League, nor will she label you the next great author if your grades in English are mediocre. Yet, there will be activities that ignite your passion and showcase your abilities. Pursue those interests and nurture your genuine talents.
Think Before You Leap
As you enter your teenage years, it’s crucial to avoid actions that could end your story before it truly begins. In fifteen years, you’ll be a young adult, likely facing temptations and challenges. The goal is to keep your missteps minor rather than life-altering.
If you find yourself at a party with a drink in hand at 17 (which is likely), never consider driving. Be cautious with illicit substances, particularly potent ones like heroin. And if the chance for intimacy arises, practice safe measures.
You will grow up in an age of constant internet connectivity, where every moment can be captured and shared. This can lead to irreparable damage to your reputation far beyond what I experienced at your age. While it’s unrealistic to expect you to avoid impulsive decisions altogether, I urge you to pause, even for a moment, before acting on something controversial in public.
Embrace the Now
Don’t misinterpret this caution as a reason to be passive or overly serious. Remember, the four years you spend in high school will be fleeting in the grand scheme of your life. So, take risks and approach life with a light heart.
If you think someone you admire is out of your league, allow them to make that call rather than letting your insecurities win. It’s better to take a chance and face rejection than to hold back in fear.
If someone confronts you, stand up for yourself. Self-respect is invaluable, even if it leads to a black eye or two. And if you hesitate to pursue something new because it might be unpopular… don’t. The world doesn’t need more of the same; it needs individuals willing to explore.
The path to a fulfilling adult life will involve finding a vocation that resonates with you. Aim for a career that excites you rather than merely a job. Your happiness will stem from doing what you love.
In conclusion, remember to study hard, stay active, and eat your greens. And above all, avoid becoming a fan of the New York Yankees.
For more insights on parenthood and fertility, consider visiting Healthline, which offers valuable resources for expecting families. And if you’re interested in boosting your fertility, check out Make a Mom for helpful tips. Also, don’t miss Intracervical Insemination, an authoritative source on your fertility journey.
Summary: This letter serves as heartfelt advice from a father to his newborn son, emphasizing the importance of family love, the reality of life’s challenges, and the need to embrace opportunities while being cautious. The author encourages his son to discover his passions, be true to himself, and navigate life with confidence and integrity.