Sometimes, it feels as if I’ve been caught in a time loop. Another summer has slipped away, the evenings are growing cooler, and the kids are back to their soccer practices. Dance lessons are just around the corner, and before we know it, Thanksgiving will arrive, swiftly followed by Christmas, lacrosse season, track meets, and recitals. Soon, we’ll be facing the bittersweet reality of the last summer both of my children will spend under this roof. With each passing month, there’s an unsettling awareness that a chapter is closing.
How did we reach this point?
It feels like only yesterday that I was sweating it out at the pool with a 2-year-old and a 4-year-old, worried about my post-baby body while also anxiously watching them to prevent any potential drownings. Kindergarten seemed light-years away, let alone high school or college. I remember sharing a knowing glance with another mom at the baby pool, both dreaming of the day we could lounge under a shade tree with a book in hand. Yes, I thought. I can’t wait until my daughter can swim independently — until she no longer needs me.
Yet, somehow, I haven’t visited the pool in three years. My daughter, now a confident swimmer, would be mortified if I showed up beside her. She has friends, trendy swimsuits, and boys vying for her attention.
While cleaning under the bed the other day, I discovered a stray green Lego piece. The days of constructing fantastical Lego worlds are long gone. In my busyness, I often rushed through those early years, eager to move past each phase — and Lego sessions were no exception. Perhaps it was my hectic work schedule combined with the demanding nature of young children that made me want to speed through it all. I hated how those tiny pieces cluttered the house.
If I had the chance to rewind, I would take it slow, savor those moments, and build a few more Lego castles. I tucked that little green brick away in my jewelry box as a reminder.
What happened to the American Girl dolls, the mountain of stuffed animals, and the princess costumes? They’ve seemingly vanished, replaced by friendships, activities, and their own personal interests. And where is my sweet son with his floppy hair? Now, there’s a 6-foot teenager in his room sporting a crew cut who often grunts, replying with “I don’t know.”
The lovely young woman occupying my daughter’s former nursery asked me to grab tampons and mascara during my last grocery run. Oh my goodness!
In the mirror, I see a woman marked by fine lines and gray roots. The weekends have grown quiet, devoid of the joyous chaos I once knew. I’m no longer the young mom managing little ones. My kids don’t rely on me in the same way they once did. Yet just the other day, my son asked me to toss the lacrosse ball for practice, and I happily obliged.
Last week, he invited me to watch Boyz n the Hood with him. My desk was piled high with tasks and articles to review, and honestly, I was looking forward to uninterrupted work time.
But isn’t it about cherishing those moments? We ended up watching the movie together, discussing it afterward — one of the few calm times we found together this summer. My daughter, too, often opens up late at night, just when I feel exhausted. But I stay awake; as long as she needs me, I’ll listen.
They still require rides, guidance, and limits. Like newborns, they seem to be constantly hungry. The remnants of childhood toys and snacks are vanishing quickly.
Times are changing, and we’ve navigated many phases together. Ahead lie new adventures and exciting beginnings. I’m committed to savoring each moment rather than rushing through. Watching a movie, having a heartfelt conversation — even if it means putting my own tasks on hold — is worth it.
This is what every parent desires, right? Independent children. My mother reassures me that my kids will always need me, just as I continue to need her, and that every age brings its unique challenges.
I suppose I simply wasn’t ready for how quickly this un-needing would unfold. It’s as if the laws of time warp when you’re a parent. The final moments come at you like meteors.
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Summary
The author reflects on the swift passage of time in parenting, highlighting the bittersweet nature of children growing up and becoming independent. While reminiscing about the days spent with young children, she acknowledges the need to cherish the fleeting moments left. The article encourages parents to savor their time together, even as their children grow and evolve into their own individuals.