Can you do self-insemination at home ?
I realized I had a problem when I started using meditation as a way to multitask. Encouraged by friends who raved about apps like Calm and Headspace, I dove into the world of meditation during the chaotic year of 2020, hoping it would help me regain the “center” I had lost under a mountain of laundry, endless dishes, constant Zoom calls with my kids, my work obligations, and the loud reminders from our cat that his food bowl was empty yet again. But as a gentleman with a charming British accent guided me to breathe and let my thoughts drift, I found myself simultaneously planning dinner, pondering which Netflix series to binge next, and keeping an ear out for squabbles or injuries among my children. When the session wrapped up, I checked “Meditate” off my mental to-do list, feeling no more centered than before.
The stereotype that mothers are perpetually tired holds true for me. I was consistently fatigued—often tired yet content, sometimes tired and stressed, occasionally tired and irritable. But tired was the common thread. While the early days of motherhood can be exhausting due to sleepless nights, my kids are now great sleepers, out of diapers, and capable of handling several tasks independently. So why was I ending each day feeling as drained as when I had a newborn?
Then it struck me: perhaps my constant exhaustion stemmed from relentless multitasking. Most of the time, my body was engaged in one task while my mind juggled another. Even when both were aligned—like checking emails—I was flitting between messages from work, school, friends, and relentless political organizations. It’s no wonder I felt burnt out by 6 p.m.
Recently, I decided to make a change and rediscovered the concept of “single-tasking.” This approach involves focusing solely on one task until it’s completed; something I vaguely remembered from my pre-kids life. For instance, when replying to work emails, I would only open emails related to my job and ignore all other distractions. More importantly, when spending time with my kids, I made an effort to be fully present rather than worrying about what needed to happen next.
Of course, as a parent, single-tasking isn’t always feasible, and many of my efforts get interrupted. However, each time I manage to do it, I notice that tasks are completed more quickly and often more effectively because I’m fully engaged. When that task is quality time with my kids or my partner, we all feel happier and more relaxed. Physically, I also feel less drained. While I haven’t completely shaken off the feeling of exhaustion, for my brain, single-tasking acts like a power nap.
Sometimes, we mothers take pride in our multitasking abilities, and rightly so; the female brain is incredibly powerful. However, there’s a fine line between effective multitasking and pushing oneself to the brink of burnout. I came uncomfortably close this past year, but I’m on a better path now—one step and one task at a time.
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In summary, embracing single-tasking has transformed my approach to daily life. By focusing on one task at a time, I’ve not only been able to complete my responsibilities more efficiently but also enjoy my time with family more fully. The journey toward reducing fatigue continues, but I feel empowered to take it one task at a time.
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