March 26, 2021
I realized I had a problem when I turned meditation into another form of multitasking. Encouraged by friends who swear by apps like Calm and Headspace, I decided to try meditation in the chaotic year of 2020, hoping to find the “center” I had lost under heaps of laundry, endless dishes, constant troubleshooting requests from my kids on Zoom, my own work commitments, and the incessant reminders from our cat that his food bowl was empty once again. Yet, as a soothing voice with a charming British accent guided me to breathe and clear my mind, I found myself simultaneously planning dinner, contemplating which Netflix series to binge next, and listening intently to my kids in the next room to ensure everyone was safe and sound. When the session concluded, I checked “Meditate” off my mental to-do list, but felt no more centered than before.
It’s a well-known stereotype that mothers are perpetually fatigued, but in my case, it was true. I was frequently tired and happy, sometimes tired and stressed, occasionally tired and irritable – but tired was the common theme. With a baby, you can attribute exhaustion to a genuine lack of sleep, but my children sleep well, are out of diapers, and can manage several daily tasks independently. My level of fatigue at the end of the day didn’t seem to match the reality.
Then it dawned on me: perhaps my constant tiredness stemmed from always multitasking. My body would often be engaged in one activity while my mind tackled another. Even when I was focused on checking emails, I was rapidly switching between messages from work, my kids’ schools, friends, and persistent political organizations. It’s no wonder I felt drained by 6 PM.
Recently, I decided to make a change and rediscovered the concept of “single-tasking.” This approach involves committing to one task at a time until it’s done; a practice I remember from my pre-kid days. For example, when it was time to respond to work emails, I would only open those emails and ignore everything else. More crucially, when spending time with my kids, I aimed to be fully present and not jump ahead to what needed to happen next.
Of course, as a parent, I can’t single-task all the time. Many attempts get interrupted. However, each successful instance has shown me that tasks are completed more quickly and effectively when I devote my full attention. When that task is quality time with my family, we all end up feeling happier and more relaxed. Physically, I’ve noticed a decrease in my fatigue. While it hasn’t vanished completely, single-tasking acts as a sort of power nap for my brain.
Sometimes, we mothers wear our multitasking abilities as a badge of honor, and rightly so, since the female brain is remarkably capable. But there’s a fine line between effective multitasking and burnout. This past year, I came dangerously close, but I’m now on a positive path, one step – and one task – at a time.
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In summary, I learned that by embracing single-tasking, I could manage my exhaustion more effectively, providing both me and my family with a happier, more relaxed home environment.