I Long for November 12th

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My closest companion is a warrior. When I refer to my best friend, I’m not talking about my college roommate—who is indeed remarkable—or my boyfriend, who is a close second. The friend I’m referring to is my mother, the woman who not only brought me into this world but also shaped my existence; the person who has always stood by my side, my personal cheerleader, my guiding light, and, at times, my lifesaver.

But everything shifted on November 13th, forever altering our lives. I still remember that chilly day in the second-floor waiting area of the hospital, the anxiety that consumed me during the two-hour surgery. When the surgeon finally emerged and led me into that small, cold room, I became just another person in that familiar space, hearing words that will remain forever etched in my memory: “A massive disease, cancer has spread. We had to remove more than anticipated. Chemotherapy will be necessary.” His announcement swirled around me like a swirling storm, fear gripping my heart at the mere thought of losing my mother. The heavy reality of what was unfolding felt like a serpent coiling around my throat, making each breath a struggle. I recall breaking down in the restroom, crouching low and pleading with God for her recovery.

The days and weeks that followed were the slowest of my life. What was expected to be a week-long hospital stay extended into weeks, with complications arising, insurance battles, medication issues, and ambulance trips during snowstorms. Nothing quite prepares you for adulthood like caring for a sick parent—not graduation, your first job, or even becoming a parent yourself. The moment you assume responsibility for a seriously ill parent, even a remarkably resilient one, it profoundly awakens you to life’s stark realities. There were nights when I collapsed onto my bed, sobbing harder than I thought possible, praying fervently for her well-being.

Before my mother’s diagnosis, my boyfriend and I were enthusiastically planning our move together, and my mother and I frequently discussed decorating ideas, my son’s kindergarten adventures, his teachers, his upcoming superhero-themed birthday party, and all the ordinary joys of daily life. But on November 13th, our routine conversations about these simple pleasures were abruptly interrupted by cancer, a lengthy hospital stay, and her ongoing recovery.

During those first weeks following the diagnosis, we were by her side at every moment, so much so that her medical team had my phone number memorized. Yet, I deeply missed our previous life—our daily chats, our check-ins, our laughter. Each night in November, as I settled into bed, an overwhelming sense of loneliness enveloped me. It wasn’t merely a longing for our conversations about the day; it was a profound yearning for the days before November 13th, before cancer entered our lives, on the day everything felt normal. I longed to return to November 12th, when life was still manageable and blissful.

Despite my mother’s remarkable strength and progress in her treatment, the fear of cancer looms over us, and we know the battle continues. I will always be her supporter, her advocate, and whatever she needs, ready to accompany her on this journey. My mom has always believed in the resilience of the human spirit; she finds beauty even amid life’s trials, and this is a message I strive to carry with me each day.

In moments when the weight of worry becomes overwhelming, I close my eyes and envision those sun-drenched summer days that will eventually return—the days we will spend outside at her home, share brunch at her favorite restaurant, watch my son play in her backyard, and discuss joyous topics like wedding plans or expanding our family. Someday, despite this painful year, we will once again marvel at the beautiful possibilities that life offers. Until that day arrives, I truly miss November 12th.

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Summary

Mia’s heartfelt reflection on her mother’s battle with cancer emphasizes the emotional turmoil of caregiving and the longing for the normalcy of life before the diagnosis. The unexpected illness reshapes their relationship, highlighting the profound impact of such experiences. Through her mother’s strength and resilience, Mia learns to cherish the beauty in life’s challenges while longing for the simplicity of November 12th.