I spent my childhood in a large, two-story brown house on the outskirts of Eastern Long Island, a couple of hours from New York City. As I grew older, I often heard strangers remark, “You resemble your dad” or “Your mom is stunning.” What they didn’t realize—and what I felt too embarrassed to explain—was that those two individuals they assumed were my parents were actually my maternal grandparents. My biological parents were simply too young, too preoccupied with their own lives, and too distant to care for me.
In many ways, I became my grandparents’ child. They were my guardians until I moved into my first apartment during my junior year of college. Like countless other children in the U.S., I was raised solely by my grandparents. Families can fracture for numerous reasons—be it incarceration, addiction, or neglect—leaving children in precarious situations. Some enter the foster care system, while others find refuge with relatives through kinship guardianship or adoption, just like my siblings and I did.
My grandparents were precisely the caregivers I needed. They provided for me financially and instilled in me values I cherish to this day. However, I was unaware of their struggles to keep a stable home. We moved frequently in search of better job opportunities, and I suspect they were also trying to escape my mother’s deteriorating behavior as her addiction to crack cocaine intensified. Each move meant starting anew in a different house.
It’s communities like Bridge Meadows that could have made a significant difference for families like mine. So, what is Bridge Meadows? It’s a network of housing developments aimed at improving the lives of children and their caregivers, particularly supporting multigenerational families like mine. Located in Portland and Beaverton, Oregon, with plans for further expansion, these communities are designed for families needing a supportive environment.
According to their website, Bridge Meadows “develops and sustains intentional, intergenerational communities for youth formerly in foster care, adoptive families, and elders, building place, permanence, and shared social purpose one community at a time.” Reading this filled me with both sadness and hope. This is not just a housing solution; it offers a space for healing and support from the trauma associated with foster care.
From experience, I can say that while my grandparents were loving, attentive, and emotionally available, I still faced trauma. My biological parents were not consistently present, and when they were, I often had to navigate their emotional turmoil. Many families experience trauma, even those who seem to have it all together. Bridge Meadows offers much-needed healing, support, and kinship for families. What family wouldn’t benefit from that?
In 2010, research indicated that 1 in 14 children were being raised by their grandparents, amounting to 5.4 million kids—an increase from 4.7 million in 2005. Notably, over half of those children were primarily cared for by a grandparent responsible for their basic needs. These statistics highlight a significant and growing need.
Families, especially multigenerational ones, face challenges that our society often overlooks. Issues like inadequate rehabilitation for substance abuse, housing instability, and lack of educational opportunities for both children and caregivers remain prevalent. Bridge Meadows is addressing these gaps and providing essential resources. As reported by CNN, without intervention, “Social Security will have to cut benefits by 2034 if Congress does nothing to address the program’s long-term funding shortfall.”
Communities like Bridge Meadows embody the saying “it takes a village” to raise children. They provide more than just housing—they offer hope to families navigating nontraditional dynamics.
Personally, one of my most significant realizations is that the only reliable community is the one we create ourselves. While I was raised by my grandparents, I now find myself raising my half-brother as my son. The little boy I took in almost fifteen years ago has taught me the essence of parenting. As his mother, I recognize how crucial a supportive community is for both his wellbeing and my own peace of mind.
Parenting, especially in a nontraditional setting, can be incredibly challenging. But communities like Bridge Meadows are vital support systems for these families. As someone who came from a multigenerational background, I would love to see this model implemented nationwide. We owe it to the grandparents who have stepped up to fulfill the role their own children could not.
For more insights on similar themes, check out this other blog post from our site. Additionally, if you’re exploring options for home insemination, look into the expertise offered by Intracervical Insemination or consult NHS’s resources on intrauterine insemination.
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In summary, my upbringing by my grandparents highlights the importance of community support for families, especially in nontraditional settings. Bridge Meadows embodies this ideal, offering essential resources and a sense of belonging for those in need.