Much to my mother’s dismay, I’m a parent who embraces a bit of colorful language. I find that occasionally throwing in some choice words can be quite therapeutic, especially after a long, exhausting day. Sure, I’m a kind person at heart, but let’s be real, I enjoy cursing and that’s not going to change anytime soon.
With my penchant for swearing (combined with the chaos of parenting), my kids are exposed to a fair amount of colorful vocabulary. And as kids often do, they absorb everything like little sponges and regurgitate it back out at the most unexpected moments.
That’s right—my kids swear. They’ve picked up a few choice phrases and use them with impressive timing and delivery. In moments of frustration, you might hear them exclaiming “darn it!” or “this is so freaking ridiculous!” They even get a kick out of giving each other the finger during playful arguments.
While it can be somewhat annoying in the typical kid-like way, I generally don’t mind. Swearing isn’t off-limits in our house, and I honestly don’t care if they mutter some expletives under their breath or exclaim them when they step on a Lego. I mean, doesn’t everyone have their moments?
Now, I can hear the gasps from those who might be judging my parenting style, but let me explain. The first rule of swearing in our household is simple: know your audience and behave respectfully. My kids understand that while home is a place of freedom, there are appropriate times and places for certain words. If they start using their colorful language at school, they’ll be facing some serious consequences.
I’ve made it clear that if I receive a call from their school regarding their language, they’ll be in for a major lecture. Just as I wouldn’t use profanity in a church setting (well, maybe I would), they need to learn that different environments have different standards. They can’t curse in front of their toddler cousin or their grandma, for instance.
Moreover, I emphasize to my kids that words carry weight, largely due to the intent behind them. There’s nothing inherently harmful about words like “crap” or “butt,” and honestly, they can be quite fun to say. However, if they use language to insult or demean someone, that’s when they’ll find themselves in big trouble.
In fact, there are plenty of words I find far worse than so-called “swear words.” Terms like “stupid” and “shut up” are strictly banned in our home. We opt for “oh my gosh” instead of “oh my god” to avoid offending anyone’s beliefs, and slurs of any kind are completely unacceptable. It should go without saying.
We steer clear of sexist jokes—even the seemingly harmless ones—and if they ever laugh at someone who is different, they’ll get the infamous death stare followed by a lengthy lecture. Negative comments about someone’s appearance, body size, or clothing are also off-limits. We aim to avoid gossip as much as possible, and mean-spirited talk behind someone’s back? Not happening. The rule is simple: don’t be a jerk.
You might think I’m a soft parent for allowing my kids to drop F-bombs casually, but trust me, I’m a hard-liner when it comes to kindness. I won’t tolerate mean behavior, no matter how many curses are thrown around. So while I’m fine with them saying “jerk,” I absolutely won’t stand for them acting like one.
Ultimately, my expectation is clear: I want them to be kind always, regardless of how someone expresses themselves. After all, even the most saintly people probably let a few choice words slip every now and then.
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Summary:
In parenting, swearing can be a part of life, but it comes with guidelines. While I don’t mind if my kids use colorful language at home, they must know when and where it’s appropriate. Teaching them respect and kindness is my top priority, ensuring they understand the power of words and the importance of being considerate to others.