“Me want mama milk now,” my little boy exclaims. He’s bouncing on my bed in his colorful pajamas, remnants of his older brother’s holiday sleepwear, and he’s ready to settle down for the night.
“Let’s go to our cozy spot,” I reply. He hops over to the far side of the bed, which is a queen with a sidecar twin, and snuggles against the pillow.
“Mama milk, mama milk,” he sings out.
I lie down next to him and loosen my collar. He latches on and nestles against me, sucking deeply and contentedly. He’s 3 years old now, and I couldn’t care less about what others think. Yes, my little one still nurses at bedtime—and sometimes even during the night. My older sons were weaned by 15 months when I was pregnant with their younger brother, but with Oliver, there hasn’t been any urgency to wean him. There’s no younger sibling to make room for, and our bed is spacious enough to accommodate him. So yes, I adore my 3-year-old, and I’m unapologetic about it.
If you ask him, he would proudly say, “Me baby.” He often declines to do things that are meant for big kids, insisting that he is still tiny. However, that doesn’t mean he doesn’t accomplish big feats. For instance, he’s fully potty trained, having achieved this milestone before turning 3, which is earlier than my older two, who weren’t trained until they were 3 ½. He insists on holding my hand whenever we’re out, which is both endearing and a bit challenging when I’m juggling bags from the library and my purse. If I’m not holding his hand, he’s clutching his oldest brother’s.
He also enjoys being worn in a wrap during our family hikes. After a while on the trail, he wants a break, and up he goes into a woven wrap. We even carry him at church, as he behaves well, but if boredom strikes, no one wants to deal with a restless 3-year-old. After my husband injured his back, we both agreed that having a wrap on hand was essential. Oliver gets worn in stores like Target, and during moments of distress, when I can’t hold him, it’s a quick solution. He’s a small 3-year-old, so it’s not like I’m carrying a hefty child, but he still weighs around 28 to 30 pounds, making it a workout regardless.
I breastfeed him, co-sleep with him, and hold his hand whenever he’s not in the wrap. Many people might view this as excessive, but it works for us—especially for Oliver, who thrives on the affection and security it provides. He relishes being the cherished baby, often playing up his cuteness and asking to be carried. As an attachment parent, I believe that as long as these behaviors don’t harm him—and they don’t—he has every right to them. They help him feel secure and special among his three lively brothers.
There are other significant reasons I indulge him as well. Oliver is likely our last biological child. Due to health issues and necessary treatments, it’s improbable that I’ll be able to conceive again, although we haven’t entirely ruled out adoption. He is our last guaranteed baby, the final one I can nurse and co-sleep with. So, I’m soaking in every ounce of baby love while I can. I know I’ll miss the moments of nursing and babywearing when they’re gone. Soon, he’ll be hiking on his own two legs and transitioning to his own bed, though he may still sneak into mine later in the night, just like his brothers have.
I’ve witnessed this growth with my older sons. They’ve gone from 3 to 4, then 5, 6, and now my firstborn is 7—old enough to read chapter books and discuss the nuances of Harry Potter. He finds Monty Python and the Holy Grail amusing, and he’s gotten old enough to watch shows that I despise, like Ninjago. Meanwhile, his 5-year-old brother is learning to read.
So I will cherish my baby for as long as I can, thank you very much. This doesn’t imply that I’ll hinder his development or continue nursing and carrying him until he’s 5—that’s not our path. But I will relish every precious moment of his babyhood. Most importantly, he’s happy, loved, and knows he is valued. I couldn’t give him a better gift.
For more insights on parenting and family dynamics, consider exploring our blog on couples’ fertility journeys. It’s essential to understand your baby’s expected arrival date, which can be found at this resource. For comprehensive information on insemination, check out this excellent resource provided by Johns Hopkins.
In summary, I embrace every moment of my youngest’s childhood, nurturing his needs while knowing he is secure and cherished, regardless of the opinions of others.