When people inquire about my well-being, I often reply, “I can’t complain.” Truthfully, I have little to complain about. We have a stable home, nourishing food, a loving partner, and healthy children. My goal is to embrace gratitude rather than indulge in grievances.
Recently, I’ve noticed that complaining has become a common form of conversation—a way for us to connect and empathize. We lament about the weather, the grocery store lines, the inadequate service at restaurants, or the never-ending laundry piles. I’m just as guilty of this as anyone else. I might grumble about the oppressive heat, my struggle to shed a few pounds (especially since I can’t bear to give up my beloved wine and carbs), or my fatigue from driving the kids around. And let’s not forget my frustration over the forty-five-minute rush hour drive to my son’s ice hockey practice.
While it’s normal to have moments of self-pity, I’ve been making a conscious effort to curb my complaints. Before I let another negative thought slip out, I remember our friend Lisa.
Remembering Lisa
I first met Lisa in middle school. She was incredibly bright, especially in English and History. Kind-hearted, soft-spoken, and always funny, she became an English teacher after attending a prestigious college, inspiring her students with young adult literature. Lisa had three sons and stayed connected with our alumni community. Tragically, during her third pregnancy, she was diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer. Just a few years later, she passed away at the young age of 39, leaving behind a two-year-old son.
The last time I saw Lisa was at a birthday party for a mutual friend’s child. It was summer, and Lisa was there with her boys, looking vibrant and engaged, her cancer in remission. She radiated a quiet strength, truly listening when people spoke to her. By October, her cancer returned aggressively, and by Thanksgiving, she was gone.
On days when I feel overwhelmed and frustrated, I think of Lisa. While washing dishes at the sink, I remind myself that she would gladly trade places with me to scrub those pots and pans. When my alarm buzzes at 6:00 am on a school day and I want to complain about the early start, I recall how she would eagerly wake her kids if given the chance. And during carpooling, when traffic gets unbearable, I consider how fortunate I am to be part of those ordinary moments.
I’m striving to be more intentional about my words and focus on the positives instead of the negatives. Shifting the conversation away from complaints can be challenging, but it’s a choice I’m committed to making.
This reminds me of a dad I see at my son’s hockey practices. Whenever I greet him and ask how he’s doing, his response is always, “Living the dream!” He says it jokingly, but he’s right—many of us are living the life that Lisa and countless others could only dream of. So, if you ask me how I’m doing today, I hope to respond, “Living the dream! I can’t complain at all.”
Resources for Further Reading
For those interested in home insemination options, check out this post about the Cryobaby Home Intracervical Insemination Syringe Kit. If you’re looking to better understand screening processes, this resource on nuchal translucency tests can provide valuable insights. Additionally, if you have questions regarding fertility insurance, this guide is an excellent resource.
In summary, while it’s easy to get caught up in the complaints of daily life, being mindful of our blessings can transform our perspective. By focusing on the positives, we honor those who would give anything for the mundane moments we sometimes take for granted.