Experiencing a miscarriage and welcoming my fourth child during the pandemic made it clear that I needed therapy. Ironically, the very situation that prompted my need for support also allowed me to access it: virtual therapy became a lifeline for many, especially for busy moms like me with little ones napping in the next room. Finally, I could prioritize my own needs by simply joining a Zoom call. I have no intention of going back to traditional in-person sessions, and neither do any other mothers I know.
Embracing the Convenience of Telehealth
This wasn’t my first encounter with therapy, but the virtual format removed the logistical hurdles that would have prevented me from seeking help during the pandemic and beyond. I’m not alone in this sentiment; a 2021 study revealed that one in four individuals had used telehealth services in the month prior. To learn more, I consulted Dr. Emily Clarke, who noted that for mothers dealing with postpartum mental health issues, virtual therapy and mental health apps like Talk Space have been crucial during this time. “As new parents, do you have the time to seek support for yourself, or even take a shower?” Instead of making long commutes during peak hours, I was able to dedicate just 45 minutes to talk with my therapist from the comfort of my home.
Whether grappling with depression or not, many postpartum parents find that therapy offers essential rest and rejuvenation. “Parents often think they can just keep giving without realizing they also need to recharge,” Dr. Clarke explains. Therapy equips them with the tools needed to navigate relationship challenges and achieve balance, which can feel overwhelming. She frequently informs parents that neurochemical changes commonly experienced postpartum can lead to feelings of sadness or being “down.” Therapy is a pathway back to oneself.
Though I didn’t officially have postpartum depression, the combination of losing a baby, trying to conceive for nearly a year, and managing work-from-home chaos pushed me to my limits. I was nowhere near the self-care imagery I saw online, struggling to balance various responsibilities while battling anxiety. One moment, I was juggling quarantine schedules, work tasks, and home-cooked meals; the next, I was overwhelmed by the thought of caring for four children under such challenging circumstances. This was a common struggle among pandemic mothers I knew.
Financial Relief from Babysitting Costs
Once I began therapy via Zoom, I noticed almost immediate benefits as I worked with my therapist on affirmations and explored the reasons behind my late-night Googling about SIDS, my frustration with life’s demands, and my self-blame regarding my child’s mental health challenges. Moreover, the only cost I incurred was the copay for my sessions, allowing me to save money that would have otherwise gone to a babysitter just to attend therapy. Many moms are likely staying away from in-person therapy for similar reasons, as therapists are now offering appointments beyond traditional business hours. Dr. Clarke also mentioned that the flexibility extends to therapists, who can work virtually in the evenings.
Comfort at Home, but Not Without Drawbacks
The comfort of therapy at home has made it easier for some clients who may struggle to get out of bed due to depression. Many find solace in being at home, especially those with anxiety about public spaces. “You can wear comfortable clothes, sit on the floor, or even be with your child while nursing or while your toddler plays nearby,” she explains. This is a stark contrast to traditional therapy settings where children are often not permitted.
However, as with any virtual experience, there are downsides. “Certain non-verbal cues can sometimes be overlooked on screen,” Dr. Clarke says, urging patients to keep their video on. “Observing behaviors that aren’t verbally expressed is crucial.” Examples include fidgeting or signs of distress. Additionally, the rapport with a therapist can feel somewhat less personal than face-to-face interactions, prompting Dr. Clarke to suggest a blended approach. “We are social beings and crave that in-person connection, but virtual therapy is certainly better than having no access at all.” And without the virtual mental health resources that the pandemic has made available, I would have found myself in a very different situation.
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In summary, virtual therapy has been a game-changer for my postpartum experience, offering accessibility and convenience that traditional methods couldn’t match. With resources available online, I encourage any mother to explore the options that suit her needs best.