As the second wave of COVID-19 surged, I found myself amidst a chorus of friends and acquaintances expressing their “COVID fatigue” and longing for the days when life felt normal again. Trust me, I share those sentiments! This year has been challenging: I lost my job, my partner and I are cooped up together 24/7 (not in a romantic way), and our three-year-old has cycled through four teachers in nine months. The lockdown has been tough, school closures are frustrating, and the isolation from family is disheartening. But you know what’s worse than all of that? Actually contracting COVID-19.
Since the onset of the pandemic in March, my partner and I have been diligent about social distancing. We’ve stayed home, sanitized our groceries, and engaged in endless Zoom calls while trying to keep our spirited toddler entertained. Friends and family would probably label us as overly cautious, and honestly, we were. With high-risk relatives in our lives, we committed to being as safe as possible—no indoor playdates, no public parks, and virtually no social interaction. It wasn’t the most exciting time, but at least it kept us safe from COVID.
Then, the unexpected occurred: One evening, my partner mentioned feeling unusually exhausted. Given his relentless work schedule, we brushed it off. The following morning, he woke up shivering, wrapped in blankets, and we instantly knew something was wrong. How could this happen? We had been careful! Despite our efforts, we later realized we likely contracted the virus over Halloween weekend, and what followed was a harrowing experience.
For three days, I was a solo parent, caring for our toddler while attending to my very ill partner, who was quarantined in our master bedroom (thankfully, we had that space, even though our apartment is only 1200 square feet). I found myself shooing him back behind closed doors any time he ventured out. I counted down the hours to bedtime, eager to shed the facade of being in control. Each night ended with me curled up, feeling overwhelmed. I had no idea things could get even tougher. (And let me tell you—single parents are true heroes; I only tasted that reality for three days, and it brought me to my knees.)
On day three, my COVID test results came back: positive. The moment I received the news, my symptoms kicked in, as if waiting for confirmation. We decided to let my partner out of his confinement; it made little sense for us both to be isolated. We donned our masks around our daughter, cracked the windows, and attempted to make the best of our situation.
Fortunately, we both experienced mild cases. While my partner dealt with flu-like symptoms and fever for two weeks, my symptoms resembled a game of CDC Russian Roulette—each day brought a new set of ailments (thankfully, I avoided severe breathing issues). The most daunting part was co-parenting while feeling this unwell. Quarantine meant we couldn’t pass our daughter off to anyone else, and every day, we both wondered how we would manage.
Initially, we whined and cried, upset that we had to parent while feeling so miserable. We tried to maintain our usual routines—my partner worked from home (yes, while sick), and I kept our daughter entertained without screens or sweets. That plan lasted one day before I broke down. We quickly realized we had to adapt our parenting approach for survival.
Key Strategies That Helped Us Cope
Here are the key strategies that helped us cope during this challenging time, not because they’re exemplary parenting practices, but because they allowed us to get through this ordeal while keeping our daughter engaged and content:
1. Keep Your Children Close:
While it may seem logical to send your kids away to protect them, our pediatrician advised against it. Kids are often asymptomatic carriers, and sending them off could risk exposing others. It’s best to quarantine together for the recommended 14 days.
2. Sleep Whenever Possible:
Fatigue from COVID is intense. If your child doesn’t nap, allow them screen time or engage them in quiet activities while you catch some rest. We broke our usual screen-time rules and let our daughter enjoy extra TV while we recuperated.
3. Let Go of Non-Essentials:
In the initial days of our illness, I tried to keep everything tidy and maintain my routine. Eventually, I had to accept that some responsibilities could wait. If you find yourself in a similar situation, prioritize self-care and time with your child over chores.
4. Simplify Everything:
Meals, activities, and entertainment need to be easy. Order takeout or buy groceries online. New toys or borrowed items can offer great distractions for your kids.
5. Accept Help:
Letting others know about your situation can lead to unexpected support. Friends and family often want to help, so don’t hesitate to ask for assistance with errands or meals.
6. Connect with Friends:
Having someone to vent to is essential when you’re feeling overwhelmed. Appoint friends as your support system, and encourage them to interact with your kids via video calls for some relief.
7. Keep a COVID Journal:
Documenting symptoms and daily experiences can be helpful for remembering your journey through this illness.
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Summary:
In navigating COVID-19 while being a parent to a three-year-old, I learned valuable lessons about flexibility, accepting help, and prioritizing self-care. By adapting our routines and expectations, we managed to get through the illness while keeping our daughter engaged and happy. Remember, it’s okay to bend the rules and seek support during challenging times.