I absolutely adore the internet. It’s my companion, a source of laughter, and a treasure trove of curious facts — plus, it has Amazon! What’s not to cherish? That’s why missing the initial airing of a show can be so disheartening. Not only do I have to wait for the right time to indulge in a series I’ve been excited about, but I also have to steer clear of my best buddy — the internet — until I’m all caught up.
Why, You Ask?
Because the web is a dark abyss teeming with spoilers.
Nothing incites rage quite like scrolling through your feed and stumbling upon a post by some obnoxious person from high school, like Timmy Tattletale, ruining your favorite show with a careless comment. “NOOOOO! (insert favorite character’s name here) just met their end!” Seriously, Timmy? What’s your deal? I always knew you were the worst.
Given how much time people spend on social media daily (and trust me, it’s a staggering amount), it’s universally understood that sharing spoilers is a major faux pas. And don’t kid yourself into thinking that typing “SPOILER ALERT” before ruining an entire season of a show makes it okay. Your eyes wander, and bam, the spoiler hits you like a brick. You’re a jerk.
The Shock of Spoilers
Seeing a spoiler online feels akin to entering a café, waiting in line, and having someone rush in to whisper, “Caroline is secretly involved with Dominic, and Jasminifred pushed her off a balcony!” before sprinting out again. You’re left standing there in shock, your excitement dashed.
Oh, and if you’re puzzled about who Caroline, Dominic, and Jasminifred are, it’s because I just made them up — that’s right, I’m not a spoiler-happy jerk!
Unfortunately, this happens all too often, forcing people to isolate themselves from the internet until they can catch up on their shows. It’s a real bummer. And don’t even start with the excuse that you want to discuss your favorite episodes with friends. You can totally do that! Just take it to a private group on Facebook, or chat in a forum. Or, I don’t know, actually talk to someone face-to-face about that emotional moment that left you in tears during This Is Us. You can bond with your friend over it!
A Personal Experience
When a recent episode of a popular show was leaked ahead of time, I stumbled upon a spoiler that ruined one of the most thrilling moments in the series — and I had not even seen the episode yet! That person is now on my list of spoiler villains. Seriously, how can someone be so inconsiderate? I sometimes wish I could sit down with them, ask what’s wrong in their life, and then shout, “I don’t care!” before tossing them to my imaginary dragons.
Discussing pivotal plot points online is just plain inconsiderate. I don’t care how pumped you are! I don’t care if you’re devastated because you didn’t see that betrayal coming. Text your pals about it — after ensuring they’re up to speed, of course. Spoiling a major twist for someone who missed an episode because they were at a family gathering is a friendship-ending crime!
Let’s Take a Pledge
Let’s take a pledge, shall we? Repeat after me: Valar Nospoilerus. All people must refrain from posting spoilers.
Further Reading
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In summary, let’s all agree to keep spoilers to ourselves and enjoy our favorite shows without ruining the experience for others.