I see you, non-parents, glancing at our sweatpants and Crocs, your lips pursed, head cocked, as if you’re bewildered by why parents seem to have given up on their appearance. Yes, we’re aware that Crocs aren’t exactly a fashion statement; the holes are practically where our dignity seeps out.
Before you start judging, before you make declarations like, “When I have kids, I’ll never look like that,” and flash that condescending look I often encounter at the grocery store, let me share a slice of parenting reality.
The Shift in Adulting
People often talk about “adulting.” For non-parents, it seems to revolve around paying bills or waking up for work. They think it’s about driving a flashy car or being independent enough to cover their own phone bill. But once children enter the picture, the definition of adulting shifts dramatically.
Adulting transforms into a series of sacrifices—though not the way you might think. It means waking up at the crack of dawn—like 5 a.m.—to prepare lunches, coax sleepy kids out of bed, and negotiate clothing choices. It’s about ensuring homework is packed, hair is combed, and teeth are brushed. Parents often find themselves in a pre-dawn debate with little boys about changing their underwear before anyone else sees them.
The Morning Rush
By the time the kids are dressed and nestled in the van, there’s little time left for self-care. Your hair is a mess, and you’re still wearing the oversized T-shirt you slept in. Running late as usual, you slip on the most convenient shoes—your trusty Crocs—because your hands are full with backpacks and lunchboxes.
Fatigue sets in from the previous night’s interruptions for water, misplaced toys, or whatever else the kids needed. By the time you return from dropping them off, the idea of putting on real pants feels like a burden. It’s already 9 a.m., and there’s laundry to tackle or dishes to wash. Taking time to get ready seems impractical, so you power through. With a toddler in the cart, you plow ahead, because life’s obligations won’t complete themselves.
Suddenly it’s 3 p.m., and you’ve only checked off half your to-do list. The toddler skipped their nap, and your son forgot a crucial item for school, forcing you to dash back to the school in your sweats and Crocs.
The After-School Struggles
Then come the after-school struggles: homework, cleaning rooms, or prying tablets away. What’s the point of putting in the effort to look presentable anyway? It’s nearly 5 p.m., and dinner awaits.
I get that this may sound bleak, especially to those who prioritize style and allure. But here’s the twist: with your first child, you’ll likely resist the urge to give up on your appearance. You’ll wake up early to look good while wondering what’s wrong with those other parents in sweats. But as more kids come along, unless there’s a pressing obligation, you’ll find that dressing up loses its appeal. It’s not that parents don’t care; it’s just that looking trendy takes a backseat to practicality.
The Essence of Adulting
This is the essence of adulting: letting go of youthful priorities to embrace parenthood. It often means trading in your sporty car for a minivan, opting for comfortable clothing like yoga pants and Crocs, and navigating school drop-off lines with unkempt hair while questioning why your child is shoeless. Shopping without makeup becomes the norm because even if you don’t feel your best, life demands action. Choosing comfort over style ultimately leads to a happier family dynamic.
A Word to Non-Parents
To the non-parents still reading, you might be thinking, “I’ll never have kids.” But here’s the truth: witnessing your child thrive in school feels more rewarding than looking great at the store. A cozy hug from a toddler outweighs the appeal of being fashionable at drop-off. Those late nights and early mornings lead to a preference for sleep over grooming.
This isn’t to suggest that parents don’t care about their appearance at all. We do! Parents attend work, church, and events where looking presentable is necessary. But when you spot a parent in Crocs and sweatpants, remember that they likely had more pressing matters to tackle that morning. Realize that, after kids, looking sharp at the grocery store isn’t quite the priority it once was. And that’s perfectly okay.
Further Reading
For more insights on the journey of parenting, check out our blog post about the at-home insemination kit, which can be a great resource if you’re considering starting a family. Also, for more information on creating a safer home environment, you can refer to this article on reconsidering bleach. If you’re planning for parenthood, this resource on fertility treatment could provide valuable guidance.
Conclusion
In summary, parenting transforms your perspective on appearance, shifting the focus to comfort and practicality. It’s about prioritizing your children’s needs and finding joy in their successes over worrying about fashion statements.