After experiencing the heartbreaking loss of his children, one father has dedicated himself to helping other dads navigate their grief. The pain of losing a child is overwhelming for both parents, but societal norms often make it harder for fathers to openly express their sorrow. While a mother’s tears are often met with sympathy, men are frequently taught to suppress their emotions in the name of strength.
One father, Mark Johnson, is determined to change this narrative. Having faced the loss of two pregnancies—a son named Ethan and a daughter named Lily—Mark struggled to cope with his feelings. He felt the need to be strong for his wife, which ultimately left him unable to process his own grief. “I found myself just lying in bed, unable to move,” he shared in an interview with TODAY. “I realized I couldn’t run away from my feelings anymore.”
Encouraging Other Fathers to Acknowledge Their Pain
In a heartfelt video, Mark addresses other grieving fathers, emphasizing the importance of acknowledging their pain. “From a young age, we’re told to toughen up and not show emotion,” he explains. “But let me tell you, it’s perfectly fine for men to cry. It’s crucial to let out that hurt. Mourning is necessary, and seeking help is a brave act.”
Mark recognizes the different expectations placed on mothers and fathers during such a devastating time. “I thought I needed to be the rock for my wife,” he recalls. “People often ask her how she’s doing, but no one seems to think to ask about me.”
Launching Grieving Dads
Determined to combat these harmful stereotypes, Mark launched a website called Grieving Dads. On this platform, fathers can share their experiences of loss—either publicly or anonymously. He personally responds to their posts, offering support, comfort, and camaraderie.
It was during a conversation with a friend from his church that Mark discovered the power of simply being heard. “When he acknowledged my pain with just a few words, it changed everything for me,” he recalls. This moment inspired him to join support groups, allowing him to open up and begin healing. “I promised myself I would help other fathers who are suffering,” he says.
Being There for Other Dads
His contact information is available on the website, and he often receives calls from dads in distress, sometimes even late at night. “Sometimes they just need to cry,” he notes. “I don’t tell them things will get better; I say they can get better.”
Mark explains that while both mothers and fathers share the same grief, societal expectations often weigh heavier on men. “We’re raised to be the protectors, which makes us feel like we’ve failed,” he adds. Special occasions, like Father’s Day, can be particularly challenging for those who have lost a child, as social media posts can serve as painful reminders.
Finding Solace in Support
Though the journey through grief is never easy, Mark finds solace in his work with other fathers and the memories of his children. The initial Father’s Days without Ethan and Lily were filled with sorrow, but now he finds moments of joy and hope. “Every day, I strive to make my children proud of me. When I think of them, I smile,” he reflects.
For those seeking additional support and information on fertility, exploring blogs like those on boosting fertility supplements or resources provided by Intrauterine Insemination can be invaluable.
Conclusion
In summary, Mark’s journey highlights the importance of acknowledging grief, particularly among fathers, encouraging them to share their pain and seek help. His commitment to supporting others in similar circumstances fosters understanding and healing for many.