From The Confessional: Our Love-Hate Affair with Holiday Cards

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If you absolutely detest the holiday card ritual—whether it’s because you refuse to partake at all or you find yourself forcing your family into picture-perfect poses while secretly loathing every moment—this post is for you. For many, holiday cards add another layer of stress to an already chaotic and costly season.

Yet, despite the collective groans about holiday cards, we still dress our children in matching outfits, bribe them with sweets for the perfect smile, and send these fabricated family snapshots to relatives we barely know. All for what? To project an image of perfection? (Spoiler alert: they probably already suspect the truth.)

Some of us do send cards, but they lean toward the “real” side—think snapshots of kids having meltdowns, makeup-free mom selfies, and homes that resemble a tornado zone. Because that’s the reality of this year. “Happy holidays,” the caption might read. “Praying for a return to normalcy in 2021.” Am I the only one feeling this way?

I don’t send out holiday cards; honestly, who cares what my family is up to? I’d rather send a thoughtful gift or skip it entirely.

Confessional #25810079: Maybe one day folks will realize that no one is clamoring for holiday cards with your family photos. I personally can’t stand receiving them and would love to return the favor. Their kids aren’t as cute as they think.

Confessional #1522299: I find myself critiquing everyone’s holiday card photo choices.

Confessional #1762016: I despise picture cards. Unless you’re a close friend or family, I don’t need to see you and your kids enjoying your vacation in Cancun.

The unvarnished truth is that many of the people you send those pricey cards to couldn’t care less and toss them straight in the trash. Consider this the next time you splurge on outfits for that “perfect” family photo.

The only smiling picture I managed to get of my daughter by the tree was while she was holding a tablet. So, I cleverly photoshopped a cartoon gift into her hands for our holiday card.

Confessional #2079953: I put way too much pressure on myself to send out the “perfect” holiday cards every year.

Confessional #1661563: I send out adorable family picture cards and coordinate matching pajamas. Yet, it feels pointless since my husband and I can barely stand one another.

Confessional #1599359: Everything in the newsletter I included with my holiday cards was complete fiction, except for the names.

Confessional #1679649: I send out lovely holiday cards every year, but I secretly loathe the holidays. I do it to maintain the image of being a perfect, Martha Stewart-esque homemaker. One year, I’m just going to sign them, “Xmas Sucks.”

Despite knowing that few friends and family genuinely appreciate our efforts, we still chase the ideal card. Even if it means bickering with our partner, kids crying, and the entire endeavor being a façade.

I do try, but the chaos of the holidays means my cards usually arrive post-Christmas.

Confessional #25810015: Holiday cards give me anxiety. When I receive one, it feels like I must reciprocate, but I just don’t see the point!

Confessional #8492179: I’m not generally an anxious person, but writing cards stresses me out. What if I misspell something? It leads to a downward spiral of self-doubt.

For many, the holiday card tradition brings unnecessary anxiety. We’re already juggling gingerbread houses, cookie baking, gift wrapping, and moving that mischievous elf.

We’ve been in our new home for three and a half years, yet this Christmas, the previous residents received more cards than we did.

Confessional #2603396: I thought I had a lot of friends until I moved to a small town and barely heard from anyone. I received just one holiday card this year.

Confessional #1679769: We sent out thirty holiday cards and only received one in return. I feel forgotten.

Confessional #1677598: I still have my holiday cards displayed; they make me feel connected to friends I haven’t spoken to in years. Pathetic, right?

Confessional #2579533: I used to love the holidays, but now it’s a constant reminder of my divorce and childlessness. I resent seeing holiday cards featuring happy children or engagement ring ads.

Ultimately, the holiday card tradition can deepen feelings of loneliness. While some families receive an avalanche of cards, others are left with only a couple. There’s nothing more disheartening than feeling isolated during the holidays.

I just got a holiday card from a pizza place. Guess we ordered too much this year!

Confessional #1597994: The only holiday card I received was from my divorce lawyer.

Confessional #1763044: My kids are crafting cards for family we can’t visit due to COVID. My youngest made one that says “Happy Waiting,” and I think we should adopt that as our new greeting.

Whether you love them or hate them, the cards you send—or receive—reflect the year you’ve had. This year, cards may feature masks or remind you of the deluge of takeout you ordered. We hope that as you reflect on the year, you find some moments of joy amidst the chaos.

Love them or loathe them, the holiday card industry is thriving and isn’t going away anytime soon. Don’t feel pressured to adhere to this tradition; sharing family moments on social media is perfectly fine. Or, if you prefer a lengthy family newsletter, go for it. Do what feels right for you, and don’t stress about perfection; the people who care about you know the real story—whether you’re thriving or barely hanging on.

For more insights on navigating family dynamics during the holidays, check out this post from our other blog. Additionally, for authoritative information on home insemination, visit this site. Also, if you’re looking for resources on fertility and pregnancy, WebMD offers excellent information.

Summary

The holiday card tradition elicits mixed feelings for many. While some enjoy sending and receiving them, others view them as a source of stress and anxiety. Despite the pressure to create the perfect card, many are left feeling isolated and overwhelmed by the expectations. Ultimately, the holiday season should focus on genuine connections rather than appearances.