My son just celebrated his eighth birthday, and we tried our best to make it memorable, even with the ongoing pandemic. With virtual schooling, there were no treats to share with classmates, and big celebrations at venues like trampoline parks or pizza places were off the table. Instead, we treated him to some e-gift cards for his favorite game, ordered his preferred takeout, sang “Happy Birthday” over cake, and arranged a small, socially-distanced get-together at the park with a couple of friends.
At eight, birthdays mean everything to kids, and this past year has seen parents brainstorming creative ways to show their children love and attention while keeping safe. Our family was no exception.
But turning 41? Well, that’s a different story. For me, aging isn’t a source of anxiety. My own birthday doesn’t weigh on my mind like my kids’ celebrations do. Many people, however, associate birthdays with negative feelings—reminders of lost loved ones or the pressure of family obligations that can sometimes feel overwhelming.
This past year, birthdays during COVID-19 have added another layer of complexity. If you were longing for solitude, it was difficult to find when quarantined with a bustling family that doesn’t quite grasp the concept of personal space.
When my daughter asked me what I wanted for my birthday, I jokingly said, “Just 15 minutes of peace and quiet!” She agreed and then promptly went to bed. The next morning, she cheerfully declared, “Mama, I went a whole 8 hours! Happy birthday!” What can you do?
Many moms can relate to the desire for just a little peace. After all, amid the chaos of family obligations, we often find ourselves planning our own celebrations. From canceled plans due to family visits to feeling overlooked for gifts, the frustrations mount.
For instance, one mother lamented how her in-laws would buy birthday gifts for her kids but insist that the toys stay at their house—what kid wants a present they can’t keep? Another shared how her husband forgot multiple birthdays, leaving her to purchase her own gifts.
The reality is, as we transition from the joyous birthdays of our youth to the often lonely adulthood, many of us feel unappreciated and overlooked on our special days. This serves as a reminder to reach out to those we care about on their birthdays. A simple acknowledgment, even without a grand gesture, can mean the world.
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In summary, while birthdays can evoke mixed emotions, it’s essential to remember the importance of celebrating each other, no matter how simple the gesture.
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