I’ve dropped the word “crap” a few too many times in front of my child, and occasionally, she echoes it back to me. We then go through the familiar discussion about grown-up words versus kid-friendly language and why expressions like “crap” aren’t appropriate for her. She understands. So when I saw the headline, “Matt Damon credits his daughter with helping him stop using the f-slur,” I couldn’t help but roll my eyes. Honestly, it should read something like, “Matt Damon Apologizes for His Homophobic Language.” It’s 2021—come on, Matt!
As a queer individual, my frustration grew as I read the article. Matt claims that his awareness shifted because of “changes in modern masculinity.” But seriously, what does that even mean? Is he implying that everyone deserves respect, including gay men who have suffered from derogatory terms like ‘f•ggot’? Let’s not dress up hatred to make it palatable for someone who has been fundamentally wrong and offensive. We shouldn’t need our children to educate us on why homophobic slurs are unacceptable—do you think so? (It’s also worth mentioning that while some view “dyke” as a slur, many queer women have reclaimed it.)
Yes, Matt Damon should set a positive example for his four daughters. He is their father, after all, and undoubtedly influences them just as he was shaped by his own upbringing. We are products of our environments. However, as individuals with our own thoughts (like Matt’s insightful daughter), we can choose to either perpetuate hate or challenge it. Matt isn’t alone in having used that word; I understand. Remember when Kevin Hart stepped down from hosting the Oscars due to resurfaced homophobic tweets? Since then, Hart has attempted to reconcile with the LGBTQ community, only to draw criticism again (thanks, Twitter) for his remarks about Lil Nas X coming out.
Matt recounted the moment his daughter held him accountable for using the f-word during dinner. He attributed his past use of the slur to a line from his 2003 film “Stuck On You.” After telling the joke, his daughter left the table to write him a letter urging him to “retire” that word. It’s astonishing that he’s been using the f-word in his household since before 2003. It took him twenty years and four daughters to realize that words hold power, especially those spoken within our homes. There’s no way he could have been unaware of how offensive that word is—he knew.
I tend to believe people are fundamentally good until they prove otherwise. I don’t think Matt Damon is a bad person (I don’t know him personally), but he is a product of his time. We are never too old to learn from our children, and they can also learn from us. If I decide to stop saying “crap” around my kid, does that mean I won’t say it when I forget my mask in the car? So let’s not fool ourselves into thinking that Matt will genuinely retire this hurtful term. Ultimately, he alone can hold himself accountable in 2021; social media can’t do it for him.
After the backlash, Matt attempted to clarify his previous comments. “I have never called anyone ‘f****t’ in my personal life, and this conversation with my daughter was not a personal awakening. I do not use slurs of any kind,” he stated in a message shared by People. This seems inconsistent with his earlier remarks, but okay.
He continued, “I explained that this word was used casually and often, including in a line from one of my movies from as recently as 2003; she expressed disbelief that there was ever a time when that word was used without thought.” He expressed admiration for her articulate understanding of how painful that word is for those in the LGBTQ+ community, regardless of its past normalization. “I not only agreed with her but was thrilled by her passion, values, and commitment to social justice.”
He added, “To be as clear as possible, I stand with the LGBTQ+ community.”
People will always be people, and hate will always exist in our society. We can strive to hold one another accountable, and we should. We can advocate for marginalized communities, like the LGBTQ+ community, every single day. While there’s a limited amount we can control in this world, we do have the power to shape what we teach our children and influence what they hear and absorb.
For more insights, check out our other blog post here, or learn more about home insemination at Intracervical Insemination. You can also explore excellent resources like the CDC’s information on infertility here.
Search Queries:
- homophobic slurs impact
- parenting and language
- LGBTQ+ advocacy
- navigating social issues with kids
- Matt Damon controversy
In summary, Matt Damon’s recent comments about his use of a homophobic slur have drawn significant criticism. While he acknowledges a change in perspective thanks to his daughter, many feel that accountability and understanding should come from within and not merely as a reaction to societal pressure. We all have a responsibility to educate ourselves and advocate for respect and acceptance in our language and actions.