As parents, we strive to set a good example for our children, knowing they often mimic our behaviors more than they heed our words. It’s a tough balance, especially when we find ourselves slipping into habits we caution our kids against. Here are five things I tell my kids to avoid but am guilty of indulging in myself.
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Overindulging in Sweets
When we return from events like Halloween or birthday parties with a mountain of candy, I strictly limit my kids to just one piece a day for three days. Yes, I enforce this rule while they toss the rest, sometimes even crafting art from wrappers. But once their bedtime rolls around, I find myself sneaking into their candy stash, particularly eyeing those peanut butter chocolates. I feel a bit guilty admitting this (okay, maybe not really). -
Neglecting Sleep
My kids are tucked into bed by 8 p.m. for my oldest and 7:15 p.m. for the twins, but I don’t follow suit. Although I preach the importance of sleep, I often extend my evening activities, finding myself awake until 11 p.m. or later. My 5-year-old even reminds me, “You should probably get to bed early, Mama,” when he sees me yawning the next day. -
Binge-Watching Shows
Currently, I’m binge-watching The Office, a habit that clearly contradicts my strict screen-time rules for my kids. My eldest didn’t watch any TV until he was three, while the twins were allowed to start at two. I only permit them one episode of The Magic School Bus each day. Yet, here I am, rationalizing “just one more episode” again and again. -
Using Inappropriate Language
While my kids are generally shielded from curse words, they’ve picked up some phrases that echo my own—like my eldest saying “Bam!” in a way that sounds a lot like “Damn!” I encourage him to choose different words, yet I find myself muttering colorful phrases under my breath when I think they’re not listening. -
Being Sedentary
I often remind my kids about the benefits of play and activity, yet I struggle to model this behavior myself. Although I get motivated to exercise after doctor visits regarding my health, those bursts of energy are fleeting. I might walk to the store during lunch, but consistent physical activity is not my strong suit. It’s clear I need to step up my game and be a better role model.
Even as I navigate these contradictions, I take pride in several positive habits I do model for my children: reading to them regularly, encouraging healthy food choices (aside from my candy sneaking), promoting kindness, and emphasizing the importance of family time and outdoor adventures.
Parents want the best for their children, often sacrificing our own needs for their well-being. We might enjoy the occasional organic peach while they munch on processed snacks, or ensure they get enough rest while we stay up late. It’s a balancing act, and while I aim to align my actions with my words more closely, I also recognize the value in being human and imperfect.
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In summary, being a parent is filled with contradictions. While I strive to instill good habits in my kids, I often find myself faltering in my own practices. Recognizing these patterns is the first step toward improvement; perhaps I can focus on one goal at a time to better align my actions with the values I wish to impart.