If you’re a woman who navigates the world with a body that doesn’t fit the narrow standards society often imposes, you’ve likely faced body shaming at least once. It’s astonishing how many people believe they have the right to comment on our appearance—despite never being asked for their opinions.
Enter Liz Parker, a newly-engaged radio personality from Atlanta, who recently shared a rather “helpful” text from a fitness trainer regarding her wedding plans. She took to social media to expose this astonishing interaction, and it’s worth a read.
“This trainer reached out to me on Twitter with an offer, and things escalated quickly,” she began her post. “I’m sharing this because I want everyone to understand that your appearance does not define your worth.” In the conversation, the trainer’s messages are highlighted in grey, while Liz’s responses are in blue.
“Congratulations on your engagement,” the trainer starts off innocently enough. “Consider hiring me to help you get in shape for your wedding.” Wait, what?
“I’m already in shape, but thanks for the offer,” Liz replies, which is a far more polite response than he deserved. But then he doubles down, asserting, “I know you want to look your best on your big day. If you don’t hire me, then at least find someone else. Those photos last forever; you want to look your best.”
This condescending message makes me want to unleash my inner dragon on this trainer. Who does he think he is? Remarkably, Liz kept her cool and responded, “I understand this might be hard for you to grasp, but I’ve worked very hard to love my body. I’m constantly bombarded with negativity about my size—people telling me I should feel embarrassed or calling me ‘disgusting.’ I’ve overcome all that and I’m proud of how I look.”
She continued, “I’ve dedicated myself to valuing my self-worth beyond my weight and have found someone who loves me just as I am, proving that true love exists despite societal standards.” The idea that our worth is tied to our waistlines is exhausting and utterly false. It’s disheartening for a professional in the health field to make such sweeping assumptions and be so insensitive.
No woman needs unsolicited reminders from a random trainer about how she’ll be judged based on her weight—society does that enough. The real victory is learning to appreciate ourselves for who we truly are, something Liz has clearly achieved.
But the trainer doesn’t stop there. He follows up with, “You can accept how you look, but you can’t be happy with it. You’re just lying to yourself.” Thanks for the unsolicited advice, RANDOM MAN ON THE INTERNET. Liz managed to respond to his nonsense for a few more messages, which you can view in her Instagram post.
In a later update on her Instagram, Liz reflected on the negative comments from trolls that followed her posts. While they didn’t hurt her feelings directly, they did shake her faith in humanity. “I was taken aback by how cruel and nasty people can be, and it made me question why we even bother fighting against this cold-hearted army of negativity,” she wrote. Thankfully, the supportive comments that poured in helped to counter the hostility.
“It doesn’t matter if you’re skinny, curvy, or somewhere in between. You gain the best things in life by being your true self—that’s what really counts.”
In summary, this incident highlights the persistent issue of body shaming and the importance of self-acceptance. It serves as a reminder that love and worth are not defined by societal standards, and positive self-image is key to living authentically.