Last Saturday, while driving to our favorite sandwich shop, I felt like everything was perfect. My kids had been exceptionally well-behaved. My daughter, without any prompting, folded the laundry, and my son, in high spirits, saved me a few pieces of his chocolate caramel bar, knowing it was my favorite. The atmosphere in the car was warm and inviting, and I was even considering surprising them with a puppy they’d been begging for all year.
As we stepped into the shop, I nearly exclaimed, “Let’s go get that puppy today!” But before I could share my excitement with the kids, my 13-year-old son shouted, “WE SHOULD CALL HER PENIS!”
This was no accident. He was well aware of the long line of customers, all glued to their phones, and he couldn’t resist the urge to disrupt the quiet. He knew exactly what he was doing, testing the limits of acceptable behavior in a public space, despite my countless reminders to avoid shouting out words like “penis” or “butthole” in public settings.
Time and again, I’ve made the blunder of assuming my well-behaved children would act the same way outside our home. Kids can be wonderfully unpredictable, can’t they? They can maintain their composure for hours at home, only to unleash a torrent of rudeness the moment they encounter strangers. This peculiar behavior often leads to a unique brand of parental anxiety, especially when you’re faced with judging eyes and disapproving glances from bystanders. And they know it, too.
From a young age, my children have perfected the art of public disruption. Just when I think they deserve a treat, like ice cream, for their good behavior, they manage to embarrass me in the most spectacular ways. They might act like they’ll starve at a friend’s dinner, making gagging gestures at perfectly good food, or they might throw a fit in a store until they get the toy they “absolutely need.”
The truth is, kids rarely feel the need to showcase the good manners we’ve instilled in them. It’s as if they actively seek out opportunities to make heads turn and parents squirm in humiliation.
Since becoming a parent, I’ve learned to appreciate how much I misjudged others while I previously observed them in restaurants or shops. I used to think, “If only they were better parents, their kids would behave.” Now, here I am, eating a hefty slice of humble pie, realizing that even the best parents can have kids who misbehave in public, regardless of past discipline or rewards.
Perhaps they’re having a rough day, or they’re uncomfortable in a new environment—who knows? They might even detest the harsh glare of fluorescent lights.
I wish I could tell you that this behavior improves as they grow older, but I can’t lie. I now have three teenagers who insist I’m the strictest mom on the planet, and yet, we still grapple with their more unruly moments every time we leave the house.
After my son’s outburst at the sandwich shop, I received the predictable judgmental stares from other diners. You could almost hear their thoughts: “What kind of parent allows their child to shout something like that?”
A child who has been “raised right” will still have their moments of obnoxiousness. That’s simply part of being a child.
So, fellow parents, stay humble and prepared—because you never know when your child will unleash their inner jerk, reminding you that today is definitely not the day for puppy rewards.
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Summary
Parenting can be challenging, especially when your children decide to act out in public. Despite our best efforts to instill good manners, kids sometimes surprise us with their antics, reminding us to embrace humility and prepare for the unexpected.