Author: Emily Johnson
Updated: Jan. 18, 2019
Originally Published: Feb. 2, 2018
The other day, while picking up my children from school, I spotted the principal stationed at the entrance, stopping parents as they exited. “Please read and sign,” she requested, distributing freshly printed letters.
“Sure thing,” I replied, juggling toddlers alongside backpacks and lunch boxes. Yet, I managed to glance at the headline—Car Line Guidelines.
Oh, here we go again.
Honestly, the fact that we need these reminders is astonishing. The car line process is not rocket science, and no adult should require a list of instructions on how to avoid being a thoughtless jerk. Yet, here we are.
Once home, I unloaded the kids and perused the rest of the memo: “Please avoid texting and driving in the parking lot. Do not exit your vehicle while using the car line. If your children need a moment to gather themselves, please find a parking space and escort them inside.”
Please this. Please that. Please, please, please.
Our principal is a saint—bless her heart—but she has way more patience than anyone deserves at this point. This is her third memo this year, and still, she opts for diplomacy. I respect her approach, but it’s time we abandon the niceties. Adults shouldn’t need to be politely reminded to act like, well, adults in the car line.
These are straightforward rules—not complicated—and I’m fed up with the inconsiderate individuals making this experience hell for everyone else. It’s time to voice the harsh truth that many are thinking. So turn down whatever Disney song is playing and listen up, Karen.
Grabs the microphone
For the last time, stop being a selfish jerk in school car lines. I don’t care if you’re running on caffeine; the world isn’t asking too much. Put on your listening ears, follow some simple rules, and at least pretend to have your act together from 7:00 to 8:00 AM.
One hour, that’s all we’re asking. After that, you can return to your chaotic life, chatting on the phone, holding up lines everywhere, and acting like the world revolves around you. That’s what this boils down to, right? You think the universe revolves around you?
I can’t fathom any other reason an adult would struggle with this process. My preschooler could break it down for you; it’s that simple:
- Drive up
- Drop off
- Drive away
The end.
If you need to check your child’s lunchbox to see if yesterday’s banana is still edible, find a parking space. If you can’t recall whether your child’s backpack has something needing your signature, find a parking spot. If your kids engaged in World War III on the way to school and someone is bleeding in the backseat, find a parking space.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT mess this up for the rest of us.
Parenting is a challenge; I get it. We all have those days when the convenience of the car line just doesn’t work out. I, too, have faced moments when parking, unloading everything, and walking kids into school felt overwhelming.
But let’s be real. If parking your car and walking your kids into the building is the worst you face today, the world won’t end. However, if you opt to inconvenience everyone else because you couldn’t get it together, well, we all know what that makes you: A jerk.
Yes, I said it. These rules are not confusing, and you’ve read them enough times. At the end of the day, if you still disregard others, you are simply self-centered. If you text and drive, you are the reigning monarch of the Selfish Jerks. And it’s time to stop that behavior right now.
Spoiler alert: Nobody appreciates a self-serving jerk. If you can’t adhere to simple, easy instructions designed to make life smoother and safer for everyone, I suggest you find another way to transport your kids.
For more information on parenting and managing these challenges, check out this excellent resource on fertility and home insemination. And if you’re looking for a great home insemination kit, consider visiting this link for more details. Also, if you’re dealing with baby issues like vomiting, this site can provide some answers.
Summary:
In summary, the car line at school should be a simple process, yet some parents make it unnecessarily complicated by ignoring basic rules. The author calls for a collective effort to adhere to these guidelines, urging parents to act responsibly and considerately. It’s time to stop the selfish antics that disrupt the experience for everyone involved.