My children have inherited their father’s tall and slender physique. Unlike many, he has never faced the challenge of losing weight; instead, he has spent his life trying to bulk up. Through weightlifting, dietary adjustments, and weight-gainer shakes, he has sought to add mass to his naturally thin frame.
He was self-conscious about his size, and I can see my kids may experience similar feelings. They’ve faced teasing from peers for being “too skinny.” For instance, my daughter has been mocked for her slender arms and legs, leading her to wear long sleeves and pants year-round to hide her body. My teenage son, who lifts weights and consumes bowls of raw tuna, often criticizes his younger self for being “ugly and skinny.” Those hurtful remarks have left their mark on him and influenced how he perceives himself.
People often ask why those who are thin strive to gain weight. The answer is simple: much like someone who wants to lose a few pounds, they might feel dissatisfied with their body and wish to change it. Believe it or not, being naturally slender can also come with its own set of insecurities.
We frequently discuss the importance of not fat-shaming others or judging them based on appearance. We all come in various beautiful shapes and sizes, deserving of acceptance. However, many individuals grapple with body image issues, and self-acceptance can be a lifelong journey for some.
It’s crucial to avoid commenting on someone’s size, their eating habits, or their appearance. Such remarks are inappropriate and intrusive. So why is it deemed acceptable to tell someone who is thin to “go eat a cheeseburger,” or question if they’ve eaten enough, or label them as a skinny “bitch”? These comments are nothing short of rude. You don’t know their story, and it’s not your place to comment on their bodies.
If someone were to say, “Why don’t you snack on some celery instead?” to an overweight individual, they would likely face significant backlash—and rightly so. Yet, this double standard persists. Both scenarios are equally offensive. Just because someone may not know what it feels like to be overweight doesn’t mean they aren’t struggling with their own body image.
Somewhere along the way, society has deemed it acceptable to shame those who are thin. Suggesting that slender individuals must be starving themselves is not only ignorant but can also be incredibly damaging. Comments about their appearance or suggestions to eat more can lead to anxiety, just as mocking their eating habits or clothing choices can take a toll on their self-esteem.
No one should be critiqued for their body size. The likelihood is that the person you’re about to shame for looking “skeletal” is already battling their own insecurities, so spare them your unsolicited advice. If you feel compelled to suggest they indulge in dessert, perhaps you should treat yourself to a slice instead. That way, no feelings are hurt, and no one is projecting their insecurities onto others.
It’s become evident that our children are absorbing these “just for fun” messages about body image. They might think it’s acceptable to belittle their peers based on size, which can lead to feelings of inadequacy and the desire to hide their true selves. This behavior can adversely affect their mental and physical well-being, and we should strive to eliminate it.
Let’s steer clear of asking others about their weight or dietary habits and refrain from giving unsolicited opinions about their bodies. There’s a world full of topics to discuss that don’t revolve around dress sizes or appearances.
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In summary, let’s foster a culture of kindness and understanding. Body-shaming, whether directed at those who are thin or overweight, is harmful. Everyone deserves respect and compassion, regardless of their size.