I recently came across a story about a friend who, while dropping off their youngest child at college, turned to his partner and said, “…as I was saying.” This playful remark highlighted a reality: active parenting is a significant, loving diversion from our adult lives, and once the children are grown, we can pick up where we left off.
As I navigate this new phase of life without kids, I’ve made some observations:
- The term “empty nest” could use a rebranding. I prefer not to define the next chapter of my life by what I no longer have.
- Transitioning to an empty nest is as monumental as welcoming children into the world. It unfolds in stages, marked by pride and joy at times, and tears at others. It mirrors our journey from 18 years ago, albeit with more sleep.
- The grocery store has become a landscape of memories. Every aisle brings back recollections tied to my children’s favorite snacks.
- Just as I connected with fellow moms when my first child was born, I’ve discovered a community of empty nest moms eager to make dinner plans on school nights—except now there are no school nights.
- The shock of this significant life change doesn’t fade in three weeks; it lingers much longer than that.
- My kids, bless them, were notorious for leaving a trail of chaos behind. The proof of their messiness is now starkly visible in their dorm rooms and my home.
- My husband has revealed a tidiness I never fully appreciated; I think he was just overshadowed by the mess created by our kids.
- My car’s low fuel light no longer greets me first thing in the morning, a stark contrast to when I shared it with three teenagers.
- Despite promises to focus more on my partner, kids at every stage are a continuous distraction. After two decades of chaos, it’s a relief to see him still here.
- An empty nest brings a sense of relief, like finally putting down a heavy burden. Even when the kids are away at school or daycare, the psychological weight of their lives remains until they leave home.
- I didn’t realize how loud my kitchen appliances were until the kids moved out.
- Activities that once felt burdensome—carpools, late-night practices, and weekend pickups—were actually cherished moments spent with other parents, moments I now miss.
- While college students may feel homesick, those ready for this new chapter will transition at lightning speed, leaving parents longing for the past.
- Children accumulate mountains of clutter, from baby swings to backpacks, and I won’t miss any of it. Cleaning out the remnants of their childhood feels like finally cleaning out the minivan; the extent of the mess is shocking.
- The silence that accompanies an empty nest is both eerie and refreshing at the same time.
- Only teenagers can create such chaos in the kitchen in the middle of the night; with them gone, the mess is gone too.
- All those jokes about college kids and laundry? They’re undeniably true. That first frantic call about mixing colors and whites will happen.
- My kids will soon discover how often their sheets were actually washed—this will be the second phone call.
- Visiting my child at college, observing their classes and friends, I sometimes find myself envious of their new life, even while feeling joy for them.
- Ultimately, I believe this empty nest phase will be rewarding. And honestly, I would relive the entire journey of parenthood again without hesitation.
This article was originally published on March 9, 2015.
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Summary
The transition to an empty nest is a significant life change, filled with mixed emotions. While it brings freedom, it also evokes nostalgia and the realization of how much parenting shaped life. Parents reflect on the joys and challenges of raising children and acknowledge that, despite the chaos, they would not change a thing about their journey.