As a single mother, I find myself completely uninterested in dating at this stage of my life. When my son was an infant, I was in a long-distance relationship with his father. Despite being together for four years, the strain of distance took its toll, and after two years of trying to make it work, I decided to end things for the sake of both of us. That was nearly a year ago, and since then, I’ve been navigating the waters of single motherhood alone.
Rediscovering Myself
Many friends have urged me to start dating again, believing it would benefit me. However, I simply have no interest in pursuing romantic relationships right now. It may sound clichéd, but this period is dedicated to rediscovering myself and focusing on what truly matters to me. After being in a long-term relationship for so long, I realized I had lost touch with my individuality. I need to reconnect with myself before considering adding someone else to my life.
The Joy of Being Single
Being single suits me quite well. As someone who grew up as an only child, I’ve always been comfortable in my own company. I enjoy the independence that comes with being alone—making my own choices without needing to consult anyone else. I can decorate my space as I wish, eat what I want, and enjoy late-night dance parties to my favorite ’90s hits without worrying about disturbing anyone. I’m reclaiming my identity as an individual, especially since I spent much of my twenties in a relationship.
A New Perspective on Life
Now that I’m almost 31, I approach life from a different perspective, particularly as a mother. Casual dating has never been my forte; I tend to invest deeply in one person, which often leads to heartache. At this point in my life, I simply don’t have the time or emotional bandwidth for casual flings. My son and I have built a strong bond, and I’m not ready to introduce someone new who might disrupt that relationship. I worry about how he would cope if he grew attached to someone who ultimately didn’t stay in his life.
Intimacy and Connection
As for intimacy, my friends seem to think I must be suffering without it. Honestly, I’ve managed to put those thoughts on the back burner. It’s not that I don’t crave connection; I just know that when the time is right, it will happen. I’m not inclined to jump onto dating apps just to please my friends.
Focusing on My Career
One of the silver linings of being single is the focus I’ve been able to place on my career. My flexible schedule has allowed me to pursue my writing ambitions more seriously, and it’s beginning to pay off. I’ve dedicated years to this passion, and I finally feel like I’m making progress. I genuinely believe that I wouldn’t have found the time or motivation to do this if I were involved in a relationship.
Trusting the Process of Love
I trust that when love is meant to find me, it will. As Diana Ross famously said, “You can’t hurry love, you just have to wait.” I appreciate my friends’ concern, but I am genuinely happy at this moment. I have a wonderful son, a career that’s finally gaining momentum, and a solid support system from family and friends. At this point, a romantic partner would be an added bonus, but I’m perfectly content as I am.
Conclusion
In summary, I am a single mother choosing to embrace this phase of life without the pressure of dating. My focus is on nurturing my relationship with my son and advancing my career, and I believe that love will come when it’s meant to.