We understand that if you’re over a certain age, you may not have been educated about the existence of pronouns beyond “he” and “she.” The challenge can become more pronounced as we navigate through terms like “they,” “zie,” or “tey.” Language is an integral part of our communication, and adapting to new pronouns can feel daunting. However, what’s crucial to recognize is that discomfort often stems from a reluctance to accept that individuals have the right to define their own gender identities.
If you find yourself feeling uneasy about this shift, it’s important to reflect on why that is. It suggests an unwillingness to acknowledge the fluidity of gender and the reality that someone’s identity may not align with their assigned gender at birth. If this concept is hard for you to grasp, perhaps stepping back is the best approach, allowing those who are nonbinary or gender-nonconforming to navigate their identities without additional strain.
Let’s be clear: No one is demanding anything extreme. We’re simply asking that you adjust your language in specific contexts. For instance, when referring to a friend who identifies as nonbinary, using “they” instead of “he” or “she” is a sign of respect. This adjustment isn’t about compliance; it’s about honoring their preferences and acknowledging their identity.
Take, for example, my sibling, Alex, who is transgender. While they were once known as my sister, they have always been Alex at heart. It’s challenging to shift my language when reminiscing about our childhood, but I strive to respect their pronouns. Calling Alex “he” may feel odd at times, especially when reflecting on past experiences, yet it’s essential to honor their identity in the present.
Misgendering someone—using the wrong pronoun—is akin to gossiping behind their back. It’s disrespectful, no matter if the pronoun is “he,” “she,” or a less conventional option.
It can be intimidating to assert one’s gender identity in a world that may not always be welcoming. Imagine having to introduce yourself daily with a declaration of your identity and the accompanying pronouns. This act of bravery requires immense courage, and as allies, we should be the ones providing support. When someone expresses their identity, wouldn’t you want to be the person who stands beside them, offering affirmation and encouragement?
Using the correct pronouns frequently and openly normalizes these identities. It demonstrates your commitment to being an ally.
Mistakes are bound to happen, though. I’ve accidentally referred to Alex as my sister in front of my kids, which led to a humorous yet awkward moment. My youngest was confused, prompting an explanation about Alex’s journey. Being called out for misgendering can be uncomfortable, but it’s an opportunity to learn and grow. Apologizing and striving to do better is part of the process.
Ultimately, respecting someone’s pronouns costs you nothing. It’s a small adjustment that reflects kindness and understanding. Those who embrace this practice contribute positively to society, while those who refuse to adapt risk being seen as unkind or inconsiderate.
For more insights on gender identity and how to navigate these conversations, check out this informational blog post. If you’re looking for expert opinions on the matter, Intracervical Insemination offers valuable resources. Additionally, for a broader understanding of reproductive health, the CDC provides excellent information.
Summary
Respecting pronouns is a crucial aspect of acknowledging and affirming individuals’ identities. While it may present challenges, making the effort to adapt your language demonstrates respect and support. Embracing this practice is essential in fostering a more inclusive environment.