Lately, I’ve been noticing a troubling trend. People seem to think my little girl is too old for diapers, assuming she has an understanding of age or the ability to follow commands from strangers. I remember my cousin, who had to constantly prove his age at youth sports events, and my brother, who faced ridicule for being taller than his friends during trick-or-treating at the age of 12.
My partner has had his share of encounters with law enforcement too, often reminding officers of his stature, because the intersection of being a tall, Black man and police officers is fraught with tension.
So when a stranger tells my daughter that “big girls don’t cry,” I need you to understand that this isn’t helpful. Just because she may seem too old to be upset about a broken crayon in a store doesn’t change the fact that she is still just two.
She still fears the dark at night and often needs her mommy when she feels sick or hurt. Even during her adventurous explorations, she sometimes reaches for my hand, seeking balance and reassurance. When nightmares strike, her size doesn’t matter. Missing her daddy won’t be soothed by a pair of “big-girl” pants.
Please don’t discourage her tears when she’s scared or uncertain. Avoid making light of her size by saying she “never misses a meal” when society falsely teaches girls that being thin is everything. Don’t rush her to grow up when I encourage her to embrace the wonder of the world around her. Childhood will fly by quickly enough, and she’ll always be my little girl.
Children deserve the freedom to grow and play, with both boundaries and the space to explore. They need love and protection, and I’m committed to providing both for her.
I refuse to allow my daughter to skip through the enchanting stages of childhood—like evening strolls with her parents or discovering the joy of newborn kittens. I won’t let her miss out on cozy nights with hot chocolate as we await lunar eclipses or the thrill of splashing in puddles. For years to come, she will wake up to presents from magic beneath the tree and mysterious eggs that appear in the garden. She will be little, and we’ll cherish every moment because many children don’t have that chance.
So for the sake of the larger kids on sports teams, the toddlers still in diapers who look older, and the trick-or-treaters who seem too tall, let’s allow them to enjoy their childhood, even when they appear beyond their years.
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In summary, let’s nurture our children’s innocence and allow them to experience the joys of being little, despite the expectations placed upon them by society.