“Everything will be alright,” someone says, giving you a reassuring pat on the shoulder. “This phase will pass.” You nod quietly, avoiding eye contact, because you’ve been taught that politeness is paramount. But deep down, you know it’s not true. The truth is, you’re battling thoughts of self-harm and feel like the world would be better off without you.
Getting out of bed is a daily challenge; putting on clothes, going to work, and fulfilling societal roles feel monumental. A casual “you’ll be okay” or “this too shall pass” belittles your suffering and ignores the harsh reality of mental illness—it’s as tangible and debilitating as a physical ailment. Dismissing it is akin to telling a child with a broken leg to simply walk it off; they can’t.
People often insist that “it’s not that serious.” Husbands to their wives, peers to one another, friends to friends—they say this because they wish it were true. From their perspective, life is manageable; they don’t feel the weight of despair or the fear of impending doom. They want to help, but they just don’t understand.
What they fail to realize is that their words imply you’re wrong for feeling this way, that your painful emotions are invalid. This only deepens your sense of worthlessness, making you feel as though you’re solely responsible for your mental state. If only you could think positively enough, you’d see that life isn’t a relentless cycle of despair.
But mental illness is a genuine health issue. No one suggests that someone with diabetes should simply “think” their way to better insulin regulation. Yet, when discussing psychiatric medication, some people launch into critiques about its effects, urging you to avoid it altogether. “Have you tried going outside more?” they ask, oblivious to how difficult it can be to even leave the couch when engulfed in sadness.
We wouldn’t tell a cancer patient to forgo chemotherapy, so why should psychiatric medications be treated any differently? They can be life-saving and deserve the same respect and understanding.
One of the most common dismissals is the phrase, “Everyone has bad days.” This implies that your struggles are temporary inconveniences, rather than the debilitating illness they actually are. True, everyone faces challenges, but not everyone experiences the kind of mental turmoil that leads to thoughts of self-harm or severe anxiety.
Then there’s the ever-frustrating “you just need to think positively.” This phrase essentially places blame on you, suggesting that your inability to shift your mindset is the root of your suffering. People with depression cannot simply will themselves to feel better, just as someone with a severe migraine can’t concentrate their way to relief. While cognitive behavioral therapy can be beneficial, it doesn’t always work for everyone without medication. Unless someone is a trained therapist, their attempts to encourage positive thinking only serve to diminish your struggle.
All of these comments, well-intentioned as they may be, minimize the very real pain that individuals with mental health issues face. They inadvertently convey that your suffering is irrelevant, that it’s your fault, and that you should simply try harder to get better. This is not only unkind but also fundamentally unfair.
Until we acknowledge that mental illnesses are as valid as physical ones and warrant the same compassion and understanding, this cycle of dismissal will persist. Those around you may mean well, but their lack of understanding can add to your pain. It’s crucial that they learn to approach these conversations with sensitivity and insight.
For more information on home insemination methods and resources, check out our article on the home insemination kit. Additionally, for a deeper understanding of human embryos, visit this time-lapse imaging resource. If you’re seeking support for infertility and intrauterine insemination, consider the excellent resources available at Johns Hopkins Medicine.
In summary, mental illness is a serious condition that requires understanding and compassion. Dismissing someone’s experiences only exacerbates their suffering. It’s essential to recognize the legitimacy of these struggles and to approach conversations about mental health with care.