I found myself a bit distant from my son lately. At 11 years old, he’s not exactly chatty—most days, I’m lucky if he strings together a few sentences. It’s been seven months since his father passed away, and in that time, he seems to have inherited a quiet, introverted nature that both intrigues and frustrates me. His little sisters do enough talking for the whole family, leaving him mostly unresponsive except for the occasional grunt when I remind him about chores.
He stays busy with summer homework, basketball practice, and rides with friends, but like many boys his age, he often retreats to the sanctuary of our basement to play Fortnite. And let me tell you, it’s a challenge to lure him out when he’s deeply engrossed in that game.
I remembered an old saying that my mom often repeated: “If you can’t beat them, join them.” So, that’s exactly what I did. I asked my son if I could join him in Fortnite, and the excitement on his face was priceless. It was like I’d offered him a ticket to an amusement park with unlimited candy.
Having not played a video game since my days with Nintendo’s Super Mario Brothers back in 1989, I knew this would be a comical experience. My son certainly agreed.
For the next hour, I found myself parachuting out of a flying bus—an experience that was as chaotic as it was entertaining. I was quickly dispatched by opponents, running through bushes and scaling mountains, all while my son guided me on how to break into cabin doors and loot treasure chests. He filled me in on the unique features of each location—Lucky Landing, Anarchy Acres, Tilted Towers—and tried to teach me how to survive and win. I even had my share of run-ins with a formidable opponent dubbed “the guy in the black suit,” who my son assured me “never gets killed, Mom.”
As I struggled to navigate the controls, I found myself utterly absorbed in the game. I was determined to stay within the “circle” before the “storm eye” caught up with me, but I often ended up facing walls, swinging my pickaxe aimlessly. My son found my blunders hilarious, especially when a gamer named Speckled Sauce eliminated me from behind. “That was a bit rude, wasn’t it?” I quipped, enjoying the rare moments of laughter we shared.
It was astonishing how engrossed I became in our time together. I realized just how easily I could have missed this special moment, absorbed in the mundane tasks of daily life. I hadn’t seen him this animated in ages. He laughed, joked about my gaming skills, and even helped me stay alive. In that brief hour, he spoke more than he had in weeks, and I felt a surge of joy when he told me I finished 11th out of 50 players—definitely a personal victory in the Fortnite realm.
That hour reminded me of the bond I have with this boy, my beautiful child who his father and I brought into this world to cherish and protect. Sometimes, it means jumping out of a bus, running through virtual landscapes, and facing challenges head-on. Other times, it’s about providing support and laughter when it’s needed most.
As mothers, we often go to great lengths to reconnect with our children and create happiness in their lives, even if it means diving into a digital universe. That’s the real win.
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In summary, finding ways to connect with your kids, even through their interests, can lead to joyful moments and lasting memories. Video games can serve as a bridge to understanding and bonding, transforming time spent together into cherished experiences.