Imagine for a moment that you’re 30 weeks into your pregnancy. You walk into a routine OB appointment, only to find yourself admitted to the hospital. A few hours later, you’re being wheeled into an operating room filled with a sea of medical personnel.
As a mom of triplets, we were well aware that a NICU stay was a possibility. We spent months preparing ourselves for this journey, but no amount of preparation can truly equip you for the emotional rollercoaster that is NICU life.
To the mama sitting by her baby in the NICU—I know this wasn’t in your plans. I’m sending my thoughts your way. It may feel like a dream or maybe a nightmare; I’ve sat in that very chair you’re in, feeling the same mix of hope and despair. The distinctive scent of hand sanitizer, the beeping monitors, the cries of tiny babies—these sounds may haunt your dreams or echo in your mind on the drive home.
Please know that you will get through this. Your world may feel like it’s been turned upside down, but there’s hope on the horizon. Remember to celebrate even the smallest milestones, for in the NICU, every tiny achievement is a major victory.
The walk to the NICU may feel endless, especially when you’re recovering from childbirth. Your body may feel like it has betrayed you, but remember that you did everything you could to keep your baby safe. Sometimes, your body is simply protecting both of you from unforeseen complications.
Leaving the NICU can be painful. You might have other children at home or responsibilities that call you away. It’s normal to feel guilty for stepping away, but know that your baby is in capable hands. Give yourself permission to care for yourself, too.
It’s heart-wrenching to see your little one in this situation, overwhelmed by medical jargon and procedures. Don’t hesitate to ask questions; there’s no such thing as a silly inquiry.
You may walk in to find that your baby needs some quiet time to rest. It’s okay; they’re working hard to grow stronger. You might spend sleepless nights pumping milk when all you long for is to hold your baby. The loneliness can be overwhelming, but I assure you, it’s worth every moment.
Feeling envious of other mothers who hold their babies right after birth is completely natural. It’s hard to watch families leave with healthy newborns while you wait. But soon, I pray you will be in that position too.
Soon, the cacophony of the NICU will fade into the background. Soon, your baby’s crib will be just steps away from you. Soon, the guilt and worry will lessen. Soon, you’ll have the joy of holding your baby on demand. Soon, you won’t feel so alone during those long nights. Soon, you’ll make that final walk to the car, filled with hope instead of heartache.
Embrace every moment in the NICU. Celebrate each small victory, as here, every little thing counts. Let this experience build your strength and resilience. You are not alone; your feelings are valid, and your strength is remarkable. It’s okay to ask for help when you need it.
Just last year, I was where you are now. My triplet pregnancy took a sudden turn at 30 weeks and 4 days, and despite our best efforts to delay labor, the day arrived. We walked back and forth to the NICU for 65 days, but eventually, we brought home three happy, healthy babies. Today, we celebrate their first year at home. Soon… I hope you will be celebrating your own milestones.
For more insights into home insemination and pregnancy, check out our article on the home insemination kit. If you’re looking to connect with other couples navigating similar journeys, visit Couples Connection. For additional information on treating infertility, the ACOG provides excellent resources.
Summary
Being in the NICU is a challenging and emotional experience for any mother. This heartfelt letter offers support, encouragement, and reminds NICU moms that they are not alone in their journey. Every small victory counts, and soon, they will find themselves celebrating their baby’s homecoming.