Dear New Parents, Avoid Purchasing Toys

At home insemination

As new parents, it’s common to stockpile essential items like bouncy seats and co-sleepers. We also found ourselves drawn to adorable toys—a plush bunny and some colorful stacking blocks—despite knowing our little one wouldn’t engage with them for quite some time. Friends and family contributed their own selections, including wooden puzzles and miniature cars.

Fast forward five years and two children later, I’ve come to realize that none of those toys were truly worthwhile. If I could offer one piece of advice to my expectant self, it would be this: skip the toys altogether. Instead, focus on gathering these 25 indispensable items that will keep your kids entertained for days, if not longer.

1. A stack of post-it notes, perfect for sticking to your mascara wand and other curious spots.
2. An empty tampon wrapper, transformed into “pirate treasure.”
3. A collection of twigs from outside, cleverly dubbed “Blair Witch Project.”
4. Every fascinating item from your junk drawer, including sticky pennies and straw wrappers.
5. A quaint coin purse, a special gift from the dentist that my 3-year-old cherishes.
6. A stash of earplugs to fill that coin purse.
7. A ripped-out page from an expensive pop-up book.
8. One of my shoes.
9. Daddy’s shoe, causing minor delays on date nights.
10. The soup ladle, which serves as an enchanting wand.
11. My toothbrush, also a wand.
12. Various kitchen tools—spatulas, bananas, and more tampons—converted into magic wands.
13. All the colanders available for a fun “car wash” game.
14. A spring from a broken toy truck, awaiting repair.
15. My phone and its packaging, plus the rubber case of my old device—anything related to phones is fair game.
16. A mountain of little bits of torn paper, which my vacuum cleaner struggles to capture.
17. Anything from the fridge. To my toddler, it’s a treasure trove of excitement. Mustard bottles, eggs, and cherry tomatoes become the ultimate thrill if only I’d let him explore.
18. All the shoes I’ve tucked away for a potential new sibling. The frequency they’ve been pulled out has convinced me that we’re done at two kids.
19. The bathroom faucet, which is second only to the fridge in attraction—he claims hours of play would make him eternally grateful.
20. The toilet—just a quick look for a special something.
21. Rocks, bugs, or even a squirrel carcass—until someone notices.
22. A turkey baster.
23. A screen door.
24. A turkey baster creating perfectly spaced holes in that screen door.
25. An empty binoculars case—a cherished item that has replaced the stuffed bunny.

In essence, don’t waste money on toys. Instead, look around your home for everyday objects that spark joy—like your favorite kitchen tongs, which will mysteriously vanish. Or consider items you want to discard, but instead, let them sit on the hallway floor for months as part of a makeshift city. The stuffed bunny? Long forgotten. The blocks? Unused. But a post-it note? That’s a classic.

For additional insights on home insemination, check out this post on baby makers or learn from experts like Dr. Leo Kim about at-home insemination methods. For more about pregnancy resources, visit Johns Hopkins Fertility Center.

Summary

New parents are often tempted to buy toys, but the reality is that everyday household items can provide far greater entertainment for children. Instead of splurging on toys, gather simple objects that ignite creativity and exploration.