Hello, Dads,
As you may have noticed, us moms often engage in conversations about motherhood with one another. We gather in online forums to share our experiences, create support groups, and read countless articles to find comfort in our shared challenges. However, you dads are often left out of these discussions, even though you play a crucial role in our lives. We frequently talk about your strengths and the areas where we hope for more support, but you don’t always get to hear that feedback. And that can be frustrating—for both of us.
So, here’s the lowdown: if you’re ever curious about what your children’s mother truly craves from you, here it is:
Encourage Time for Herself
One of the best gifts you can give your wife is some time alone, away from the house. I’m not talking about running errands (unless that’s her thing). I mean real free time without any family obligations. Even if you share household responsibilities evenly (which we’ll touch on shortly), your wife may still feel the weight of those duties more acutely. Assure her that your kids will be perfectly fine in your care and encourage her to take a break. If she’s unsure of what to do, suggest activities like browsing at Target, catching a movie, or simply relaxing with a book—all guilt-free.
Provide a Clean Space for Relaxation
This tip complements the first one. Sometimes, moms of young kids just want some quiet time alone in a tidy home. If you can tidy up and then take the kids out for a few hours, you’ll be amazed at how much this simple act will mean to her.
Share Household Duties Equally
If your wife appears overwhelmed, it could be because managing a household and ensuring children are both physically and emotionally healthy is an enormous, never-ending, and often unpaid task. Whether she works outside the home or stays home, it makes sense for you to contribute significantly to the household chores. Choose a few responsibilities you don’t mind handling and take them off her plate. Plus, trust me, there’s nothing quite as attractive as watching you do the dishes or whip up a meal.
Express Your Appreciation
Even if circumstances limit your ability to help out as much as you’d like, it requires minimal effort to express your gratitude for everything she does. Running a household and being a mom is hard work, often unrecognized. It’s nearly impossible to overstate how much she will appreciate hearing that you think she’s amazing and that you respect her efforts. Say it often and say it loudly.
Capture Moments with the Kids
Make it a habit to snap photos of your wife with the children, both alone and together. She likely has countless pictures of just the kids and probably some with you, too. Focus on capturing her when she looks her best, but also during everyday moments. When my aunt passed away, it was heartwarming to find photos of her with her children across different stages of their lives. These pictures are precious gifts for both her and your kids.
Reassure Her of Her Beauty
Motherhood can affect how a woman perceives herself in various ways. While I believe it enhances a woman’s beauty, society often sends a different message. It’s essential for her to hear that you find her attractive, not just when she’s dressed up or when you’re in the mood. My partner often tells me I’m stunning even when I’m lounging in pajamas with no makeup on, and knowing he means it carries significant weight.
Every woman is unique, so you’ll need to gauge what resonates best with your wife. However, many of these suggestions are universally appreciated. If you genuinely want to impress her, don’t wait for her to ask. The more proactive you are, the better the impact.
None of these actions are monumental, but each can create a significant difference. Choose a few to incorporate into your routine, and you’ll witness the positive effect on your relationship. Trust me.
Sincerely,
Your New Ally
In summary, Dads, your partner needs your support and recognition. Simple gestures like offering her time alone, sharing household responsibilities, expressing appreciation, and capturing family moments can significantly improve her well-being and your relationship. For further insights into parenting and family dynamics, check out resources like Progyny’s blog for valuable tips.