It is with deep regret that I must express that we have let you down. As a member of the generation responsible for setting unrealistic benchmarks for college admissions, I am ashamed to witness the burden we have placed on your shoulders. The system is deeply flawed, and you are left to navigate the absurdities we have created over the years in pursuit of higher education.
I apologize for the message you’ve received—that a 4.0 GPA is insufficient and that your dedication throughout high school is merely inconsequential. Let me clarify: achieving a 4.0 GPA is an outstanding feat that reflects your tenacity and character. The obsession with college acceptance has sent a detrimental message to those who are poised to lead our nation soon.
You deserve to be uplifted and empowered rather than feeling defeated. Instead of commemorating your remarkable achievements, we have conditioned you to think they fall short.
Over the last few weeks, my office has been filled with students who are disheartened by their college rejection letters. I empathize with their pain, which is all too real. While I believe that we ultimately end up where we are meant to thrive, it is difficult to convey this to an 18-year-old who feels as though their aspirations have been crushed and their efforts rendered worthless. It is a challenge to reassure them that everything happens for a reason when they feel spurned by institutions they once held dear. It’s even harder to remind them of their worth when they’ve been led to believe that acceptance into a “good college” is the key to happiness and success.
Emma’s Story
Consider the case of Emma, the daughter of a close family friend, who boasts an impressive 4.2 GPA, three years in student government, and leadership roles in service organizations. She scored over 1460 on the SAT and excelled in writing, falling just shy of a perfect score. Emma was even named one of her high school’s valedictorians and was selected for Girl’s State in her senior year. Despite her achievements, she was denied admission to UCLA and waitlisted at UC Berkeley.
I struggle to comprehend this. It seems nonsensical. While I recognize that competition is fierce, and others may have higher scores or GPAs, her dedication and accomplishments deserve recognition. The message sent to her was simply, “Sorry, not good enough.” Emma is destined to create transformative change in the world, and any university would benefit from having her as an alum. I hope she preserves her rejection letter and, one day, as a U.S. Senator or an influential journalist, returns it to UCLA with gratitude for reminding her that success is determined by who you are, not where you go.
Rethinking College Admissions
I firmly believe that every high school senior should read Frank Bruni’s book, Where You Go Is Not Who You’ll Be: An Antidote to the College Admissions Mania. It sheds light on the flawed mindset many young people adopt, believing that their future hinges on college acceptance. Bruni illustrates that success is more about the combination of passion and skill rather than the institution itself.
Bruni cites Condoleezza Rice, a former U.S. Secretary of State and current Stanford professor, who attended the University of Denver. She emphasizes that the quality of your education comes from how actively you engage with it, particularly through relationships with professors. This reinforces the idea that success is less about the name of the college and more about personal growth and opportunity.
The term “good college” is subjective, yet many students and their parents obsess over it, leading to undue stress and anxiety at a time when young people should be enjoying life. I know many successful individuals who attended community colleges or trade schools and found their true calling. They exemplify the essence of success.
My Own Experience
As for my own experience, I attended a state university that may not be deemed prestigious, but it equipped me with invaluable skills and connections. The professors genuinely cared about their students, and my peers, though diverse in career paths, have all found success in their respective fields. Our college years were enriching and pivotal.
Remember, gaining admission to college is merely the start of your journey. If you faced rejection, it does not define your worth or achievements. You are more than a score, a grade, or a letter. Acknowledge your hard work and the potential that lies ahead.
Allow yourself to feel disappointment, but don’t linger there. Embrace the opportunities that are open to you. There is no singular “perfect” school; many options may lead to great outcomes. Success is not contingent upon acceptance into a selective institution; rather, it is rooted in hard work, determination, and resilience.
Final Thoughts
Class of 2018, you are poised to accomplish remarkable things. As you step into the world, I hope you learn from our missteps, focusing on passion over praise, imagination over status, and fulfillment over image. Prioritize happiness in your next steps. Stay driven, humble, and uphold your integrity. This is your time to discover who you truly are and to embark on an exciting new chapter.
Keep your eyes forward, your mind sharp, and your heart open. Onward!
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In summary, the pressures of college admissions can weigh heavily on students, leading to feelings of inadequacy. However, success is defined by much more than the name of an institution. It is essential to recognize your worth, appreciate your efforts, and embrace the unique opportunities that lie ahead.