On a calm evening, about six months before our wedding, my soon-to-be partner looked at me with curiosity and asked, “If I ask nicely, could you reveal your secret stash?” I felt a wave of discomfort and avoided his gaze. My mind raced as I considered the contents of that stash. Was I really ready to expose my private struggles?
With a deep breath, I stood up and walked to our bedroom. I reached beneath the bed and pulled out a shoebox filled with things I had never shared with anyone. As I returned to the dining room and opened the lid, hundreds of little white slips spilled across the table, accompanied by the unmistakable thud of my checkbook.
At just 23, I was considered an adult with a decent job, yet I had no clue how to handle my finances. My approach to “banking” involved tossing receipts and bills into a box, only addressing them when the threatening letters arrived, warning of disconnection. I would stop spending when the ATM informed me of insufficient funds. Cooking, parallel parking, and jumpstarting a car were skills I lacked. I had graduated with a nursing degree and could handle a cardiac emergency, but balancing a checkbook? That was beyond me.
It was a hard pill to swallow. Thankfully, my partner, ever patient, helped me grasp the basics of budgeting. We spent hours poring over my checkbook until it finally “balanced.” I felt embarrassed, but my eagerness to learn and grow helped me forgive myself. Over time, I became more adept at managing my finances and, today, I could give Martha Stewart a run for her money in the kitchen.
What’s the takeaway?
I belong to Generation X, and I, too, stumbled into adulthood unprepared. My generation prides itself on being self-reliant and driven, often believing we have it all figured out. We are the original latchkey kids, who grew up amid rising divorce rates and a booming economy, surrounded by the bright colors and loud sounds of the ’80s.
Despite our reputation for cynicism, many Gen Xers have become successful and resilient. Yet, it’s disheartening to see us belittle millennials, assuming we had our act together when we were their age. We seem to forget that we, too, were naive and inexperienced, stepping into adulthood without a roadmap.
Recently, two women from Maine launched The Adulting School, designed for millennials struggling with adult responsibilities. This innovative institution offers courses on budgeting, insurance claims, and even retirement planning. The classes are filled with eager 20-somethings who want to learn how to thrive independently, proving they don’t shy away from seeking help.
There’s an argument that millennials have not been adequately prepared by their parents for the complexities of adult life, but I disagree. Not knowing how to pay bills or manage debt doesn’t mean they are ill-equipped. I still struggle with Snapchat, and we all continue to learn and adapt. We should embrace the fact that millennials are navigating their journey differently from us in Generation X.
I would have eagerly enrolled in The Adulting School back in my twenties to learn about budgeting. Jokes about millennials seeking quick fixes or lacking job skills are easy to make, but transitioning to adulthood is a daunting challenge. Providing resources for young adults to succeed is a positive step forward.
What’s more, millennials display a level of self-awareness and openness that Gen Xers often lacked. Instead of hiding their struggles, they seek out solutions to improve their lives. I admire their ability to find work-life balance and utilize technology for efficiency, while also being candid about needing assistance.
No offense to my fellow Gen Xers, but I would gladly trade places with a millennial in a heartbeat. Millennials are managing just fine, and they don’t require our judgment. We need to abandon the “back in my day” mentality as we observe their growth and development. They’ve learned to navigate parenting in the digital age and tackle social issues with passionate resolve. Honestly, there’s much we could learn from this generation, including how to navigate platforms like Snapchat!
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In summary, it’s time for Gen X to recognize that millennials are thriving in their own right. They are not just surviving but actively seeking ways to adapt and succeed in a rapidly changing world, often with tools and resources that we didn’t have.