In this advice column, our team addresses your questions about parenting, relationships, and everything in between.
This week’s dilemma: Grandma disapproves of the screen time rules you’ve set (or haven’t set).
Dear Home Insemination Kit,
I don’t believe in limiting my children’s screen time. Perhaps my perspective will change in the future, but right now, my kids (ages 7, 5, and 3) can watch TV or use their tablets whenever they choose. They engage with their screens for a while, then move on to other activities. This approach works for our family, even if it may not suit everyone. The issue is that my mom won’t stop criticizing me. She thinks I’m being lazy and too lenient by allowing them this freedom. The truth is, my kids aren’t glued to their screens. They play outside, engage in independent play, and interact with each other and their friends without a problem. I’ve tried explaining this to her, but she gets incredibly worked up about it—especially when I let them use screens during mealtimes sometimes. She constantly nags me, even in front of my children. Is she onto something? Or is she being unreasonable?
I want to emphasize the importance of your own words: “This works for us.” Every family is different, and what suits your family may not be right for another. That’s perfectly acceptable! What matters most is that your setup works for you and your children.
My perspective on screen time is that we often place too much emphasis on it. Society—including parents and grandparents—gives it way too much importance. When something is overly valued, it can become more enticing, leading people to crave it. By integrating screens (like TV, computers, or tablets) into your daily life as just one option among many, it’s natural that your kids can self-regulate their screen time. Some days they may spend more time on screens, while on others, they might prefer outdoor play.
My own daughter exhibits similar behavior. There are days when I realize her tablet hasn’t been charged in 48 hours, while other days, she’s eager to watch a movie and binge a few episodes of her favorite show. My husband, who has ADHD, struggles to self-regulate in this way. So you’re right—what works for some families won’t necessarily work for others. But if your current approach is effective for your family, that’s fantastic.
Instead of confronting your mom directly, maybe help her see it from a different angle. Adults often binge-watch shows or scroll through social media for hours as a way to unwind and escape. Why should it be any different for kids when they’re watching their favorite shows or playing games? If she can’t consider it from that viewpoint, remind her that she has already raised her children, and these kids are yours. They’re doing just fine! Also, considering the ongoing pandemic, if this is how they cope, that’s okay. They don’t need Grandma undermining their mother’s authority.
Good luck!
For more insights, check out this blog post for additional perspectives. If you’re looking for expert guidance on this topic, you can also visit Intracervical Insemination, a reliable source. Additionally, News Medical provides valuable information on pregnancy and home insemination.
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Summary:
The letter discusses a mother’s approach to screen time for her children, ages 7, 5, and 3, which involves no limits. She faces criticism from her mother, who believes it’s a sign of laziness. The author encourages the mother to embrace her approach, emphasizing that different families have different needs and that self-regulation can be a natural outcome of integrating screens into daily life. The article suggests helping Grandma understand the perspective of screen time as a coping mechanism, especially during stressful times like a pandemic.