In a revealing moment at the studio, I arrived a bit late and shared a disconcerting experience with my colleagues. Their responses ranged from skepticism to outright disbelief: “Are you sure?” and “Maybe it was just a misunderstanding?” It was evident that my truth was being questioned. I later shared my initial encounter on my show’s social media page, where I received a mix of support and similar incredulity from some followers.
Women and people of color often find their realities dismissed. We hear comments like:
- “You’re overreacting.”
- “Don’t be so sensitive.”
- “If you hadn’t done that…”
- “Think of it as a compliment.”
- “That happened to me once, but I’m not complaining.”
I was excited to learn that Anita Thompson, a prominent media figure and founder of Feminist Dialogue, highlighted a simple yet profound way to counteract this dismissal. During her presentation at a recent conference, she emphasized that one of the most revolutionary actions we can take is to genuinely believe women when they recount their experiences.
Just imagine that. The act of belief—an approach that urges us to trust individuals when they describe their encounters, rather than only acknowledging positive narratives. I once dated someone who dismissed a serious harassment case I brought up with the remark, “Women often make those things up.” While my own experiences of being stopped by the police don’t equate to assault, they echo a broader theme: dismissal and disbelief.
I find it empowering to witness the collective strength of women and marginalized groups who can raise their voices online and drive change. So, if you’re hesitant to join in, remember that you possess an incredible power every day: the power to believe in others.
Reflecting on my commute through Washington Heights—a journey from a vibrant Dominican-American community to a suburban area with a predominantly white population—I vividly remember an incident in 2008. I noticed three vehicles pulled over as I exited the highway. A police car was ahead of a van driven by a Latino man, while another sedan with a brown-skinned driver and a woman sat nearby. After letting a car with an Anglo driver pass, the officer made eye contact with me and gestured for me to pull over.
“Where are you from?” he demanded, leaning into my window.
I replied, hands firmly on the steering wheel, “From Manhattan.” My voice, polished and professional, momentarily threw him off. “Actually, I’m the host of a show on CNBC. Can I show you my ID?” He nodded, and after examining it without offering any explanation, he handed it back and waved me off.
I drove away shaken and furious, acutely aware that I had been caught in an undocumented labor sweep. Was it lawful? I still question that. Did I worry for those left behind? Absolutely. Was it a distressing experience? Without a doubt. But it would have been less painful had those around me chosen to believe me.
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In summary, the power of belief can change the narrative for women and marginalized communities. When we choose to listen and validate their experiences, we take a significant step toward fostering understanding and change.