This is a shoutout to all my friends choosing a child-free life, especially those bracing for awkward holiday family gatherings. Feel free to share this on your social media and watch the reactions of your curious relatives.
Dear Inquisitive Relatives,
The holiday season is here! Halloween has passed, and we’re hurtling toward the end of the year—Thanksgiving, Christmas, and all the festive gatherings. It’s a time for joy, but also for establishing some boundaries. So let’s get real for a moment about something your frustrated daughter/daughter-in-law/partner might be too polite to say.
In short: Please stop asking about babies.
She understands your excitement. She’s aware of the veiled references to her friend Liz and her spectacular maternity photos where she looked “so radiant, frolicking in that stream,” (which, by the way, is more like a drainage ditch, no matter how many filters were used).
She’s noticed how every Thanksgiving, you dig out the family albums and reminisce about how adorable her partner was, and how thrilled you are that you saved that tiny sailor outfit for (insert knowing glance) “… someday.”
And yes, she sees you gazing at her midsection every time you get together, silently judging whether her oversized shirt might be hiding a baby bump or just the new bakery around the corner.
She’s weary of accepting glass after glass of wine just to demonstrate that, no, there’s no bun in the oven (and hey, maybe that’s how this made it onto her social media).
She really doesn’t want to hear about your second cousin’s best friend’s daughter who found a donor and now has the cutest kids. And no, she doesn’t want to hear about the guy you think would be “just perfect.”
Here’s the truth: Pressuring her, even in a light-hearted way (hint: you’re not subtle) won’t make her want kids any sooner. It will only create resentment. If she decides to have a child before she feels ready, she will be the one facing potential challenges like postpartum depression or anxiety. She may embrace motherhood wholeheartedly, but that’s a choice she has to make without pressure from those who should support her.
And when things get tough (and trust me, they might), where will you stand, Grandma? Sure, you might offer to help out—change a few diapers or give her a night off—but then what? You’ll head back home, possibly pulling the “I did my part” card with a chuckle, and yes, you did. You made your choices, and now it’s her turn to make hers. If you’re eager to have babies around, consider fostering, adopting, or volunteering. But please, keep your opinions about her reproductive choices to yourself.
With love from someone who stands up for her child-free friends.
For more insights on this topic, check out this blog post at Home Insemination Kit. If you’re looking for expert advice, Intracervical Insemination is a great resource. And for those interested in pregnancy-related topics, Kindbody offers excellent information.
In summary, navigating family expectations during the holidays can be challenging, especially for those who choose not to have children. It’s essential to communicate boundaries and prioritize personal choices without external pressure.