As a Black woman, I feel compelled to share a crucial message with my well-meaning white friends. Throughout my life, I have primarily surrounded myself with white individuals. In my younger years, I often overlooked the nuances of our racial differences and their impact on our daily lives. However, recent events have heightened my awareness of my interactions with white friends, not out of fear that they harbor hidden racism, but due to their self-proclaimed “wokeness.”
It seems there is a trend among white individuals, particularly white women, who strive to showcase their anti-racist credentials almost as if it were a competition. I want to emphasize that this isn’t a contest. Attempting to prove your allyship often veers into the territory of performative activism. So please, take a step back and genuinely engage with the issues.
The Responsibility of Allyship
The phrase “You’ll call me out if I mess up, right?” has been uttered by several of my white female friends. While I joke that I’ll let them know when they slip up, the reality is that it shouldn’t be my responsibility to point out your missteps. If you truly embody the “woke” persona you project on social media, you should be able to recognize your own errors.
I want to share some truths that may be uncomfortable but are essential for genuine allyship. If you’re committed to this cause, you must fully invest yourself. You cannot selectively choose which issues to advocate for.
Hypocrisy in Outrage
Take, for example, the recent Super Bowl. I couldn’t care less about football; I only tune in for the Halftime Show if the performer piques my interest. This year, I was excited about Justin Timberlake headlining. As a longtime fan, I was thrilled, but many of my white feminist friends posted lengthy rants about their disdain for him, claiming, “Unless his performance is an apology to Janet Jackson, I’m not interested. He’s cancelled.”
Let’s unpack that. “Nipplegate” occurred 14 years ago, and it’s important to note that Justin wasn’t solely to blame. Janet Jackson is a capable adult who doesn’t need you to speak on her behalf. That controversy has long since faded; it’s time to move on. Expecting Justin to issue a public apology for your sake trivializes the situation.
Moreover, your outrage feels hypocritical when you fail to show consistent support for Black women. You can’t express indignation over a performance while simultaneously participating in marches that often center around white feminism. These demonstrations gained momentum primarily due to white women facing threats to their rights under certain political leadership. Meanwhile, the rights of Black women have always been compromised.
Support Beyond the Spotlight
You praise Black women for their contributions, such as voting for Doug Jones, yet you neglect to extend that support to Black women running for office. Why is it that you rally behind Michelle Obama or Oprah solely for their speeches instead of recognizing politicians like Kamala Harris who are actively working in the field?
It’s commendable that you’re teaching your children about historical Black figures, but there are countless others beyond Rosa Parks and Harriet Tubman. To broaden their education, introduce them to women like Phyllis Wheatley or Sojourner Truth. Contemporary figures such as Lorraine Hansberry, an influential playwright and LGBT rights advocate, or Nina Simone, a legendary musician, should also be included. There is a wealth of knowledge to explore.
Understanding Historical Context
And please, let’s allow Martin Luther King Jr. to rest. His legacy shouldn’t be co-opted to fit your narratives about peaceful protest. If I see another generic meme quoting him for your benefit, I might just lose it. He was a man who faced severe opposition, and it’s essential to listen to his broader body of work as well as that of contemporaries like Malcolm X and Dick Gregory.
When you claim to support social justice, yet only focus on select issues or individuals, it undermines the entire movement. You can’t champion the #MeToo movement while overlooking the Black woman who initiated it. When you suggest charities that don’t uplift Black communities, I notice. When you respond to a Black friend’s discrimination by emphasizing their professional status, I see that too.
Authenticity in Allyship
If you’re only “woke” when it’s convenient, the authenticity of your commitment is questionable. It’s time for “woke” white women to reflect and take genuine action. If you’re interested in deepening your understanding or engaging more seriously with these topics, check out resources like this fertility insurance FAQ or consider learning more about how you can uplift marginalized voices.
Conclusion
In conclusion, being an ally requires more than just surface-level engagement. It demands a commitment to understanding and uplifting the voices of those who are often overlooked.