As I lounged by the pool, I couldn’t help but notice a woman with a stunning physique—flat stomach, perky bust, and a stylish bikini. She had several kids yet looked like a swimsuit model, and envy bubbled up inside me.
Thoughts of self-doubt raced through my mind.
“I shouldn’t wear a swimsuit.”
“I’m not fit enough; my body has stretch marks and sagging skin.”
“I haven’t lost the baby weight.”
“My legs are unshaven.”
“I don’t belong here.”
These negative thoughts consumed me, causing me to retreat under my towel and watch from the sidelines while she actively engaged with her children, creating memories I longed to share.
At the start of last summer, I realized I was squandering valuable moments by wallowing in self-criticism. I decided enough was enough. I needed to embrace my body as it is and commit to enjoying summer without the weight of my insecurities.
So, I made a choice. Instead of dieting or overexerting myself to fit into a bikini, I simply put on my swimsuit. I wore it every chance I got, splashing in water with my kids, racing down water slides, and even daring to try a pool zip line.
I recognized that I had spent far too long criticizing my body instead of celebrating it. I began to appreciate the strength and resilience that my body has provided throughout my journey of motherhood. I might not shed the baby weight, and that’s perfectly fine. What matters is that I belong in my swimsuit. If I let my worries about my appearance hold me back, I would inevitably miss out on unforgettable experiences.
My children aren’t going to remember me for the size of my jeans; they’ll remember the joy I radiated while swimming and the love I showed both them and myself.
Starting to love my body took time and continuous effort. After nearly four decades of internalizing negative thoughts, I knew healing wouldn’t happen overnight. I had to learn to appreciate my “mom bod” and treat myself with kindness. Reflecting on what I value in my body helped me shape the values I want to instill in my kids regarding their own bodies. I learned to speak to myself with love, just as I would to my children or friends.
Finding joy in fitness, engaging with my kids, and wearing clothes that make me feel good—regardless of the label—became essential. It’s crucial to fill your mind with positive affirmations about your body to combat the inevitable self-doubt that arises.
Recently, while on a beach vacation with my partner, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror while adjusting my swimsuit. I noticed my stretch marks glistening in the sunlight, and for a fleeting moment, I questioned my confidence. Yet, I felt powerful and happy. I realized that I truly love who I am, and I refuse to let negative comments define me.
Later, as we paddled on the water, my partner complimented my swimsuit—the very one that showcased my purple stretch marks. But more importantly, it was the suit that made me feel vibrant and confident. I radiated that energy back.
I’m done holding back. I’m finished comparing myself to others because I am perfectly me, and my body has accomplished incredible things. Life is fleeting, and time spent with my family is invaluable; I don’t want to miss a single moment this summer. So, I will wear my swimsuit with pride.
So, I encourage you: put on your swimsuit—bikini, one-piece, or swim shirt—and dive into summer. Make memories, stop the comparisons, and begin your journey toward self-acceptance and love.
For more insights about the journey of self-love and embracing motherhood, check out this excellent resource on pregnancy and home insemination from the CDC. If you’re interested in learning more about self-insemination, visit this blog post for helpful information.
Summary
Embracing your body and wearing a swimsuit is essential for enjoying summer with your children. Instead of letting insecurities hold you back, focus on creating joyful memories and loving yourself. It’s about appreciating your strength and the experiences shared with your family, not about fitting into a certain size.