Let me preface this by saying that my four sons fill my life with joy, laughter, and a profound understanding of unconditional love. However, there are days when I find myself yearning for the quiet company of my cat.
With the return of my two middle sons due to sudden college closures, I was initially excited about spending more time together. The first week was a whirlwind of board games and bonfires, but quickly transformed into what feels like a quirky sitcom.
Being the sole woman in a house full of men is challenging at the best of times. So, it’s no surprise that the chaos of quarantine has amplified my observations of this unique household.
A Fork in My Bathroom
Seriously, why is there a fork in my bathroom? Under what circumstances does anyone think it’s acceptable to leave a fork on the back of the toilet? I can only assume it was meant for some culinary adventure, but I’m pretty sure that bathrooms aren’t designed for pasta enjoyment!
The Ice Maker Is Always Wrong
Crushed ice has limited uses—think margaritas and daiquiris—yet every time I attempt to fill my glass with cubed ice, crushed ice spills out instead. With a household of five, it’s no wonder there’s one son who loves crushed ice and is forever switching the settings on our refrigerator. I do hope he’s not making cocktails for anyone—he’s still a minor!
The Kitchen Is Open 24/7
In a household of young men, the kitchen operates like a 24-hour diner. Despite my efforts to cook dinner most nights, my boys seem like bottomless pits, always on the hunt for their next snack. Just the other night, my youngest emerged from his lair to whip up nachos at 1:30 am, leaving a trail of mess behind him. When I asked why he was eating at that hour, his answer was simple: “Me hungry.”
Our New Time Zone: BST (Boy Standard Time)
I used to think the only time changes we’d experience were the seasonal ones. Now, I’ve come to realize we’re on BST—Boy Standard Time. Breakfast is served at 1:00 pm, lunch at 5:00 pm, dinner around 8:00 pm, and bedtime? That’s a mere afterthought around 3:00 am. Hence the late-night snacks!
Mt. Dirty Dishes
Our home is famous for the ever-growing Mt. Dirty Dishes. This impressive pile can be seen at any hour, and just when I think I’ve conquered it, a new eruption of dirty dishes appears as if by magic. It’s as if every pot and pan has decided to throw a party in the sink. Perhaps it’s a supernatural phenomenon, influenced by the kitchen chaos mentioned earlier.
A Trail of Clothes and Shoes
Finding my boys is as easy as following a trail of their belongings. A shoe here, a discarded t-shirt there. Occasionally, I feel like the Wicked Witch of the West, warning them that if they don’t clean up, they might lose their precious WiFi connection. Thankfully, the Good Witch reminds them that there’s no place like home—but they still need to pick up after themselves!
“I’m in the Middle of a Game”
This phrase has become the bane of my existence. Whether it’s time for dinner or asking for help with groceries, the refrain “I’m in the middle of a game” echoes through the house. I sometimes wonder if they’re gaming in their sleep!
Decoding Their Language
Listening to my boys converse can feel like deciphering a foreign language, filled with terms like Pepega and PogChamp from gaming culture. I could try to throw in some 80s slang, but they’d likely just roll their eyes and say, “OK, Boomer.”
It’s safe to say I’m not the only mother feeling a little overwhelmed by her kids right now. Yet, amidst the chaos, there is kindness and love. Next time my boys ask me to go to the store because the pantry is empty, I’ll smile and say, “Sure, but right now, I’m in the middle of a game.” If you want more insights into parenting during these times, check out this other blog post, or for more authoritative information, visit this link and this excellent resource.
In summary, life with my boys is a mix of chaos, laughter, and unexpected moments that ultimately deepen our bond.